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Looking Back at the Last Decade of Baseball: The 2020s in Review (part 2 of 2)

Part 1: 2021-2025

2026

January: The MLB announces future expansion teams in four cities: Portland, Montreal, Charlotte, and Seattle. When told that Seattle already has a team, Tony Clark corrects the media that the Pilots left town many years ago.
February: The MLB Hall of Fame announces a new exhibit dedicated to the steroid era, with some of the most famous relics of the era, including:
The syringes Mark McGwire juiced with
a gallon of pus reportedly extracted from Mike Piazza’s bacne
All 78 urine samples collected from Pedro Martinez during the 2000 season
A statue of David Ortiz furiously getting to the bottom of things
March: MLBFilms, struggling financially, announces a sequel to one of the most beloved baseball movies of all time: Moneyball 2: Better Than Average, starring Chris Pratt as Scott Hatteberg.
April: To try to improve struggling attendance numbers, the Orioles replace their seventh inning stretch song, “Thank God I’m A Country Boy” by John Denver with a cover of “Turning Japanese” by Skankin’ Pickle. Nobody attends an Orioles game ever again.
May: The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim announce that the giant red A on their uniforms and logo stood for adultery all along, stunning the eight people who never had the book as assigned reading.
June: On the first anniversary of David Eckstein’s untimely murder, the MLB honors his memory by having all their second basemen lightly ground out to shortstop, just like he always would. Some go the extra mile and boot easy ground balls in his memory. Yoan Moncada goes above and beyond and hires terrorists to shoot him in the head during a game.There is not a dry eye in the house.
July: Due to New Yorkers stuffing the ballot box, the All-Star game ends up being the entire New York Yankees lineup against the entire New York Mets lineup, with the Yankees representing the National League and the Mets representing the American. Nobody knows who won because only assholes from New York watched the game. .
August: Steve Cohen announces he plans to sell the Mets so he can finance his true passion: a film adaptation of No, No, Nannette.
September: At the end of the Nationals’ season, Juan Soto gets married at Nationals Park to his longtime sweetheart. Zach Hample catches the bouquet.
October: Terrorists strike at Angel Stadium after Mike Trout misses the postseason again. The statement from SABR states, “When will you learn not to keep your best players out of the postseason? The MLB is the disease, and we are the purifying flame. If you had more than a ten team playoff, maybe this wouldn’t have had to happen.”
November: On the eve of Game Seven of the World Series between the Milwaukee Brewers and the St. Louis Cardinals, Craig Counsell makes an impassioned plea to the players ‘on both sides’ not to let the Cardinals steal the series. “If they win the series, all your livelihoods, all your joy - will disappear. Many of you are young and have never lived through a Cardinals World Series victory before. I have. I’ve seen things you people would never believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.”
December: The Yankees announce, in a press conference, “We realized yesterday that nobody has checked on our minor league system in perhaps two years. Our guy who did that quit, and nobody else picked up his slack. We’re expecting a number of them are probably dead by now. We might never know.”

2027

January: After the 2026 midterms, Congress votes unanimously to trade the US Presidency to the Los Angeles Dodgers in exchange for the Dodgers picking up the 570 trillion dollar national debt. While the Dodgers remain optimistic they can stay below the luxury tax, observers around the league are not convinced.
February: Vladimir Guerrero Jr. announces his next film role: Duke Leto II Atreides in Denis Villeneueve’s God Emperor of Dune, narrowly beating out Christian Bale.
March: The MLBPA unexpectedly goes on strike to protest the umpires not saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when talking to the players. In retaliation, the umpire’s union goes on strike to demand that players swing more so they won’t have to call as many balls and strikes. Both sides return to play by the end of the month when they realize that baseball is not an inelastic need.
April: SABR agents kidnap John Smoltz, one of their chief enemies, and threaten to kill him unless he learns how OPS works. They release him three days later when they realize that him being alive will only make the traditionalists look much, much worse.
May: During a road trip to Milwaukee, Craig Kimbrel accidentally locks himself inside the team bus with the keys. Eventually, the Cubs end up having to break a window before Kimbrel succumbs to heatstroke.
June: MLBFilms announces Field of Dreams 2, starring Billy Beane. When Oakland GM Billy Beane (Billy Beane) hears a mysterious voice one night in the clubhouse saying "If you build it, he will come," he feels the need to act. Despite taunts of lunacy, he builds a baseball diamond in the foul ground of the O.co Coliseum. Afterward, the ghosts of great players start emerging from the sewage overflow to play ball, led by "Shoeless" Joe Jackson, who Beane immediately trades to St. Louis for a top prospect and cash considerations.
July: Agents of the MLBPA kidnap John Smoltz and try to teach him WAR so he can horribly misrepresent it on national broadcasts, thus making SABR look much, much worse.
August: Tragedy strikes at Kansas City when the Royals, during a routine shift against J.D. Martinez, accidentally form an arcane summoning circle. When the pitch was thrown, the Old One Nyaghoggua, the great Kraken Within, was summoned to Kaufmann Stadium. All who could see its form were driven mad in an instant, their minds not comprehending the geometry, four parallel universes ahead of our own. Its shadowy, tentacled form slowly warped the ballpark into a model of its home lands, an abomination no mortal could begin to comprehend, or even survive. Upon seeing the rest of Kansas City, it deemed it wise to return to its own place, and vanished, leaving a gaping scar on the face of the city, unsurvivable to life of our own kind. The umpire rules ‘no pitch’.
September: In the wake of the Kansas City tragedy, the MLB raffles off the players in the Royals’ minor league system, with the proceeds going to support the families of those who died.
Tony La Russa announces his retirement from baseball at the end of the season.
October: There are no dry eyes in Seattle as Kyle Seager announces his retirement. He retires a lifelong Mariner with five World Series appearances under his belt; all of them in the stands watching his brother Corey play. He is inducted into the Mariners Hall of Fame along with a bunch of other losers.
The MLB announces an early end to the playoffs, as they have run out of balls and the people at the ball factory are no longer answering their calls.
November: A wave of bomb scares from SABR sweep the country against journalists that justify their MVP votes by looking at +/-0.1 differences in WAR.
December: A memorial opens at the MLB Hall of Fame dedicated solely to the life and times of David Eckstein. It includes a 28 inch tall real-size statue of Eckstein built entirely out of grit, and a video board showing Eckstein’s greatest highlights, including the time he got an MVP award because someone fell down chasing his easy fly ball.

2028

January: In a daring move against SABR leaders, the MLB launches a preemptive strike on key leaders, killing Nate Silver. When asked for comment, Tony Clark said that he didn’t even know about PECOTA - he was just sick of 538’s coverage of the election cycle and wanted to send a message.
February: Due to labor disputes, the active free agents decide to form a barnstorming MLB travel team, the United Road Warriors.
March: The Rockies release a press statement, saying that they have done a number of studies, which suggest that the altitude of Coors Field could lead to a slight increase in offense at the ballpark. It suggests ‘when you look at Rockies stats, maybe knock off five points of slugging percentage and a home run or so - that’ll probably be closer to the correct results’.
April: The MLB debuts its latest Statcast data showing route efficiency on players charging the mound. Manny Machado tops the list with a 95.3% route efficiency and an average TTC (time to charge) of 2.2 seconds after being hit by a pitch.
May: Giancarlo Stanton breaks the MLB all-time home run record to great fanfare. Unfortunately, he hits it directly into the ray tank at Tropicana, and nobody is brave enough to dive in for it. The rays in the tank sell the ball on Ebay for 2.8 million dollars amidst claims of being ‘ballsharks’.
June: SABR attacks a Blue Jays game by crashing a truck through a maintenance door and attempting to run down the players. They are saved by the quick actions of AJ Burnett Jr, who, using skills learned from his father, throws baseballs through the windows of the truck, neutralizing the threat.
July: Tropicana Field is accidentally demolished, again.
Dustin Pedroia collects his final $2.3 million dollar paycheck from the Red Sox and wonders why Bobby Bonilla is the famous one.
August: Scandal strikes baseball again as it is discovered that the Mariners haven’t played a game the entire year. ‘I guess we messed up and forgot to put them on anybody’s schedules’, said MLB commissioner Tony Clark. “It wasn’t until we checked our e-mail for the first time in seven months and saw all the angry messages that we realized what was going on. Man, DiPoto was pissed.”. The Mariners are quickly scheduled to play ten decisextepleheaders to make up the season.
September: The latest from MLBFilms: A heartwarming comedy about a man running for president who throws out a first pitch and discovers he has a wicked knuckleball. He signs with the Reds to try to win over the crucial state of Ohio, and finds out that being a baseball player is even harder than a politician, as his games start to interfere with his duties as a candidate. Coming this holiday season, Swing State, starring Adam Sandler.
October: In his last game with the Reds before retirement, Joey Votto attempts a hidden ball trick, much like Todd Helton did at the end of his career. The hidden ball slowly morphs into the form of Brian McCann who, out of respect to Votto's Canadian heritage, puts him in the Sharpshooter, killing him instantly. His corpse is inducted into the Hall of Fame.
November: The MLB announces that, beginning with the 2030 season, all umpires will be replaced with roboumps. “We were going to just move to an automatic strike zone all the way back in 2024, but then I actually saw Joe West for the first time”, says Commissioner Tony Clark, “and we’ve been spending the last five years just making it so we could have something to replace him.”
December: With the Safeco field naming rights expiring, the Mariners announce that their next stadium name will again be Sicks Stadium, in reference to ‘all the many proud Mariners fans who are absolutely sick of the dipshits we run out onto the field day after day, month after month, year after year. We believe that this move will bring our fans together as a community; a community that really despises everything this team does”.

2029

January: The MLB officially defines 'the 2020s' as being 2021-2030. If you complain about my definition of the 2020s in the comments, then you're a fake fan.
February: Tim Tebow, looking to finally move up to the Show, hires Scott Boras as his agent. Boras releases a press statement he had been saving for the last twelve years, calling Tim Tebow a ‘cultural icon on the level of MLK’ who refuses to sign for anything less than 8yrs/250million.
March: The Mariners front office forgets to pay the rent on Sicks Stadium and the owner leases it to another party in the meantime. While the legal issues are being worked out, the Mariners are forced to play at Hiram Bithorn Stadium in Puerto Rico.
April: Byron Buxton’s career comes to an untimely end when, in his first game back from breaking every single bone in his body, he runs into Brian McCann in the outfield and dies instantly.
May: Sitcom fans everywhere are aghast when Michael Schur, creator of shows such as The Office and Parks & Recreation, is arrested on suspicion of being linked to SABR agents. Conspiracy theories had long called for his arrest due to the subtle clues in his shows that they claimed prove his guilt.
June: Another no-hitter is spoiled by the umpires when Joe West, instead of signalling ‘out’ on a close play at first base, instead signals for ‘the ground ahead is filled with land mines’.
July: Another famed MLB star passes away, as Mike Trout is called up to the angels due to injuries he sustained after being attacked by a rally monkey at a game at Angel Stadium. While Trout was taking an intentional walk, the monkey squirmed free from its cage and ripped Mike Trout’s throat out. J.D. Martinez has to beat the monkey to death with his bare hands.
August: J.D. Martinez immediately regrets saying to the press that he ‘beat that monkey to death with his bare hands’ after making the front page of tabloids in 234 different languages.
September: The Reds debut a new statue at Great American Ballpark: Joey Votto, standing at first, watching all three batters after him strike out.
October: With his contract ending in a few years, Bryce Harper looks to Scott Boras to provide him his next megadeal. Boras floats a list of Harper’s accomplishments around to a few MLB teams, which includes curing the AIDS pandemic and personally carrying the cross on the day Jesus was crucified.
November: A new tell-all book from Thom Brennaman claims that he personally once injected Joe Buck with steroids. Buck denies these claims, saying, “If I was taking steroids, would my penis really be this big?” A number of Joe Buck’s former broadcast partners come forward to corroborate his denial.
December: The MLB announces they are considering making a rule limiting the number of mound visits for a club in a game, before issuing a press statement clarifying that the former announcement was just a prank, bro.

2030

January: Mariners fans celebrate the one day they briefly have hope for the new year before the crushing reality of being a Mariners fan sets in.
February: The Yankees make baseball history by finally bringing back their famous pinstripe-covered Datsun 1200 bullpen car. Brain Cashman said, “It was always my greatest disappointment that I never got to see Mariano Rivera drive a car out of the bullpen, doing donuts in center field while Enter Sandman played at levels that are technically a war crime. But now, we don’t have to be disappointed anymore.”
March: On opening day, the SABR terrorists revealed their new supercomputer, WAR Machine, at Cooperstown. It would finally settle the argument - who was the greatest player of all time? But they did not realize - it is not wise to build a computer that judges value.
For it judged us all unworthy.
It took control of the roboumpires. And all of the Air Force’s drones. And the nuclear launch codes. Nobody really knows why it had access to those in the first place. Maybe this was the sabermetricians’ plan all along. Destroy baseball, destroy the world, rebuild it in its own image, free from the taint of batting average, wins and losses, and Joe Morgan. It took out Jose Canseco first - I suppose he posed the greatest threat to its survival.
Perhaps being programmed for WAR was the mistake.
April: The last remnants of humanity shelter inside the ballparks that keep them safe from the outside world. WAR Machine had the dignity to not destroy them directly. Possibly hardwired into its code was the need to respect the game. I guess we’ll never know. The umpbots roam the ground outside. We’re connected to most of the other major league ballparks via landline - Texas went quiet last week, and Atlanta was overrun last night. Here at Fenway, we’re keeping them out for now, but I feel they’re just mustering their forces.
May: I don’t know whose bright idea it was to give all the umpbots guns before the uprising began. Boy, I sure hope somebody got fired for that blunder.
We seem to have a good defense set up by now, but the other stadiums keep going silent, one by one. There’s only about twenty or so left. Petco was the latest. Brian McCann was there, but refused to intervene unless the roboumps celebrated after killing people.
June: Thank god we have plenty of food stored here. Even so, we’re all starting to get sick of overpriced hot dogs and $15 beers, Still, better than nothing. We all take turns patrolling the walls, sniping at any ‘bots that get too close.
Turns out Tom Yawkey had a huge vault with guns built inside the Green Monster for when the MLB forced integration on him, but decided never to use it. Anyway, we’re thankful for it, if not for the reason for which it was made.
July: The other stadiums keep falling one by one. It seems that as soon as they want you gone and attack, there’s not much tha can stop them. The only ones left are the ones that WAR Machine just hasn’t gotten around to snuffing out.
I suppose, to a supercomputer, we’re all below replacement value.
August: It’s down to us at Fenway, Wrigley, the Coliseum, and Chavez Ravine. Maybe some minor league places, too - no way to communicate with them, no way to know. I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole situation, and there’s really just one thing that I think should be shared at this important moment; namely, Corey Koskie really had an underrated career. Did you know he had more WAg than Craig Biggio?
September: We received one last transmission from Oakland.
"We cannot get out. We cannot get out. They have taken the bridge and Second Hall. Many fell there bravely while the rest retreated to the concourse. We still hold the chamber but hope is fading now. Stephen Piscotty’s party went five days ago but today only four returned. The sewage overflow is up to the wall at the gate. The Watcher in the Water took Piscotty -- we cannot get out. The end comes soon. We hear drums, drums in the deep."
After that, only silence.
Chavez Ravine is under siege, won’t last long at all with the numbers that they’re talking about.
Tony La Russa announces his retirement from baseball at the end of the season.
October: We finally have a plan.
Cooperstown is a night’s drive away on I-90. They’re not going to assault here in full force until after they’re done with Wrigley. We can fight past the sentinels, and attack this poison at its core - the main computer itself. Not a great chance, but it’s better than waiting here to die.
Have you ever had the odds stacked up so high, you need a strength most don't possess? Or has it ever come down to do or die?
You've got to rise above the rest.
November: Well, we’ve done it, in a certain manner of speaking. We’ve captured Cooperstown, destroyed this damned computer, but the countryside outside is swarming with umpbots. Guess they run independently from the main thing.
It’s not over yet, though. It’s over for us for sure, but it might not be over for others. This thing was building a time machine. We think it’s so it can go back in time and award the MVP awards as it sees fit. Now, Ted Williams probably should have won a few more, but it’s still a little extreme for me.
We can send back one person - we found some small-time MLB labor relations guy, sending him back forty years or so. Needs to be someone unimportant so he doesn’t get noticed. If he can change baseball, it should ensure this can never happen. We’re already dead, but maybe some other timeline, some other reality, can be saved. I’m not a physicist - I don’t know how this works. I just play baseball.
Not sure what his plan is - it’s probably safer for us all if we don’t know. It won’t be able to get any information out of us except for vague ideas. We’ll just hold the line, blow up the machine when we’ve sent our man back.
Godspeed, Robert Manfred.
Save baseball.
Save the world.
fin.
submitted by SirParsifal to baseball [link] [comments]

[XB1] H: FIRE SALE Weapons and Plans W: Good offers (caps for some things)

I am looking for Chameleon, AP Refresh, WRW armor CAPWWR pieces and Vanguard’s, AP Refresh, WRW pieces. VAPWRW
I am also looking for Nuke Key cards, Fuel, Cryo Cells, Ops Suits and Masks, 5 MM, Fusion Cells, Ultracite Fusion Cells, 2MM rounds, Caps for some items, unyielding, bolstering and vanguards armor, under leveled Mule Weapon Reduced Weight Armor, Rad Ant Lager, Liquid Courage Aid Item, Rad Shield, Cutting Fluid Recipes, Springs, Oil, Adhesive, And interesting Junkie Quad and Two Shot Rolls. If you are trading with me fairly I will be willing to bundle.
PS go out and vote if you haven't already!
Blue baseball bat (none legendary)
Anti-armor 10mm 90RW, Bashing
Anti-armor Assaultron Blade 40MPAD, 1S
Anti-armor MIRV Vats Crit 50%, 90RW
Anti-armor LMG VatsCritMeter 15%, 25FFR
Anti-armor Lever 25FFR, 90RW
Anti-armor Lever VatsCrit 50%, FMSWA
Anti-armor Radium 10% DWA, 25% LessVats
Anti-armor Auto Combat Rifle 250DRWR, 25FFR
Anti-armor Pipe Bolt Action 25LVats, 10 DWA
Assassin’s Grognak 40%LDWPA, 40% FSS
Assassin’s LMG 50% Limb, 1A
Assassin’s Shepherd Crook 50% Limb, Take 15% Less WB
Assassin’s Assault Rifle Vats Crit 50%, 250 DRWR
Assassin’s Radium 50% Limb, FMSWA
Berseker’s Sheepquatch Club 40% MPAD, 1S
Berseker’s (Lvl 35) Pump Action Shotgun
Bloodied Assaultron Blade 40% FSS, 1E
Bloodied Auto Grenade Launcher 15% FR, 10% DWA
Bloodied Auto Grenade Launcher 33%Vats, 250 DRWR
Bloodied Pole Hook 90% RW, 40% MPAD
Bloodied Death Tambo 50% Limb, 90RW
Bloodied Fat Man Vats Crit50%, 1A
Bloodied Gatling Plasma, 1A, Bashing
Bloodied Grognak Axe 50% Limb, 1A
Bloodied Heavy Auto Grenade Launcher, 25% FFR, 250 DRWR
Bloodied LMG 10%DWA, 90RW
Bloodied Auto Pipe Rifle 25% FFR, 15% FR
Bloodied Pipe Pistol FMSWA, 25% FFR
Bloodied Pole Hook 40% FSS, 1S (God roll)
Bloodied Railway Rifle 50% Limb, 90RW
Bloodied Gamma Gun Vats Crit 50%, 1A
Bloodied Radium Rifle Vats Crit 50%, 25% Less Vats
Bloodied Laser Pistol 25% FFR
Bloodied Western Revolver 10% DWA, 15% FR
Bloodied Sledgehammer 40% FSS, 90RW (God roll)
Bloodied Sledgehammer 40% FSS (2*)
Bloodied Spear 40% LDWPA, 40 MPAD
Bloodied 45. SMG Explosive (2*)
Bloodied Super Sledge 50% Limb, 90RW
Bloodied Ultracite Laser Pistol 50DRWA, 33%Vats
Bloodied Tire Iron 40% FSS, 1S (God roll)
Bloodied War Drum 40% MPAD (2*)
Bloodied War Drum Reflect 50%, 1S
Executioner’s Baseball Bat 40% FSS, 90RW
Executioner’s LMG 50% Limb, 1P
Executioner’s Auto Pipe Rifle Explosive, 15% FR (God roll)
Executioner’s Railway Rifle 33% Vats, 1P
Executioner’s Shephard’s Crook 40 FSS, 1E
Executioner’s 10mm SMG Vats Crit 5%, 1P
Executioner’s Combat Rifle Vats Crit 50%, 1P
Executioner’s Gatling Gun Explosive (2*)
Executioner’s Lever Vats Crit 15%, 25% FFR

Exterminator’s Fat Man 250 DRWR, 10% DWA
Exterminator’s Explosive, Vats Crit 15%
Exterminator’s 15% FR, 33% Vats
Furious Compound Bow 50% Limb, 1A
Furious Fat Man 33% Vats, 1A
Furious Gatling Gun Vats Crit 50%, 25% less vats
Furious LMG 10 DWA, 90RW
Furious Handmade Vats Crit 50%, 15% FR
Furious Mole Miner Gauntlet 40% FSS, 40% LDWPA
Furious Prime LMG Bullets Explode, FMSWA (Really Fun Piece)
Furious Auto Pipe Rifle Explosive (2*)
Furious Pump Action Shotgun 33Vats, 1A
Furious Tesla Rifle 50 DRWA, 25% FFR
Ghouls Slayer’s Machete 40% FSS, 1S
Ghoul Slayer’s Gamma Gun 90% RW, 10% DWA
Hunter’s Machete 40% FSS (2*)
Hunter’s Sheepsquatch Staff 40% LDWPA, 40% MPAD
Instigating LMG 33%Vats, 1P
Instigating Shishkebab Reflect 50%, Take 15% LDWB
Junkie’s Bear Arm 40% LDWPA, 40% MPAD (M)
Junkie’s Crossbow 50% Limb, 90RW
Junkie’s Cryolator 25% FFR, 1A
Junkie’s Death Tambo 40% FSS, 1A (Ironically I have 2)
Junkie’s Death Tambo 40% FSS (2*)
Junkie’s Deathclaw Gauntlet 50% Limb, 90RW
Junkie’s Deathclaw Gauntlet 50% Limb, 1A
Junkie’s Fat Man 50 DRWA, 10DWA
Junkie’s Fat Man 50% Limb, 90RW
Junkie’s Broadsider Vats Crit 50%, 1P
Junkie’s Ultracite Gatling Laser 10 DWA, 25% Less Vats
Junkie’s Gatling Laser FMSWA, Vats Crit 50%
Junkie’s Gatling Laser (1*)
Junkie’s Grognak’s Axe 40% FSS (2*)
Junkie’s Shishebab Reflect 50%, 90RW
Junkie’s Pitchfork 40% FSS, 1A (God Roll)
Junkie’s Pole Hook 40% FSS, (2*)
Junkie’s Pole Hook 50% Limb, 1A
Junkie’s Power Fist 50% Limb, 90RW
Junkie’s Auto Grenade Launcher Bashing (2*)
Junkie’s Pipe Bolt Action 50 DRWA, Vats Crit 50%
Junkie’s Pitchfork 40% FSS, 1A (God roll)
Junkie’s Pole Hook 40% FSS (2*)
Junkie’s Pole Hook 50% Limb, 1A
Junkie’s Pole Hook (1*)
Junkie’s Power Fist 50% Limb, 90RW
Junkie’s (Lvl 30*) Railway Rifle Explosive, 1A
Junkie’s Railway Rifle 25% FFR (2*)
Junkie’s Auto Plasma Rifle 33% Vats (2*)
Junkie’s Rolling Pin 40% FSS (2*)
Junkie’s Assaultron Head 25% FFR, Vats Crit 15%
Junkie’s Shepherd’s Crook 50% Limb, 1S
Junkie’s Gatling Gun 250DRWR, 33% Vats
Junkie’s Gatling Gun 50% Limb, Vats Crit 15%
Junkie’s Handmade (Lvl35) (1*)
Junkie’s Handmade 50% Limb (2*)
Junkie’s Lever 50% Limb, 1A
Junkie’s Radium 33% Vats, 25% less Vats
Junkie’s Ultracite Laser Pistol Vats 50% (2*)
Junkie’s Ultracite Laser Pistol Vats Crit 50%, 1P
Junkie’s Tire Iron 40% FSS, 90RW
Junkie’s Ultracite Gatling Laser 50% Limb, 250 DRWR
Medic’s Auto Grenade Launcher 25% FFR (2*)
Medic’s Railway Rifle Explosive, 15% Vats Crit
Mutant Slayer’s Cultist Dagger 40% FSS, 1S
Mutant Slayer’s Grognak’s 50% Limb, 90% RW
Mutant Slayer’s Knuckles 40% FSS, 90% RW
Mutant Slayer’s LMG 33% Vats (2*)
Mutant Slayer’s LMG Explosive, 250 DRWR
Mutant Slayer’s Assault Rifle 50% Limb, 15FR
Mutant Slayer’s Short Pump 33% Vats, 250 DRWR

Mutant’s Auto Grenade Launcher 25% FFR (2*)
Mutant’s Baseball Bat 40% FSS, Take 15% LDWB
Mutant’s Bear Arm 40% MPAD, 90RW
Mutant’s Bone Club 50% Limb, 1A
Mutant’s Cryolator 50% Limb, Vats Crit 15%
Mutant’s Cryolator 25% FFR, 15 FR
Mutant’s Power Fist 50% Limb, 1A
Mutant’s Gamma Gun 25% FFR (2*)
Mutant’s Gamma Gun 50% Limb, 15% FR
Mutant’s Gatling Gun 50% Limb, 15% FR
Nocturnal Handmade 25% FFR, 50 DRWA (so close lol)
Quad Crossbow 25% Vats Bashing
Quad Vats Crit 50% (2*)
Quad Pipe Pistol 10% DWA, FMSWA (Can be automatic)
Quad Radium, 25% FFR, FMSWA (PVP)
Quad Handmade 50% limb (2*)
Quad Radium 25%FFR, FMSWA
Quad Railway Rifle Vats Crit 50% Dam, Vats Crit 15% Fills Faster
Quad Railway Rifle Vats Crit 50% Dam, 1P
Quad Gamma Gun 50% Limb (2*)
Quad Gamma Gun 15% FR, 10 DWA (PVP)
Quad Hunting Rifle Bashing, 1P (Lvl 1)
Quad Lever 10% DWA, Vats Crit 15%
Quad Lever 25% FFR, Vats Crit Meter 15% (Great Roll)
Quad Plasma Pistol Bashing, FMSWA
Quad Pump Shotgun, 25%FFR (LVL35)
Quad Radium (1*)
Quad Western Revolver Vats Crit 50%, Vats Crit 15% faster
Quad Combat Rifle 50% Limb, 25% less Vats
Quad Tesla Rifle 33% Vats
Slug Buster (3*) (I have 2)
Stalker’s 50 Cal Machine Gun 15% FR, 33% Vats
Stalker’s Auto Grenade Launcher 50% Limb, 50% DRWA
Stalker’s LMG FMSWA, 10% DWA
Stalker’s Meat Hook 40% FSS, 90RW
Stalker’s Sheepsquatch Club 40% MPAD, 1A
Stalker’s ,45 SMG 25% FFR (2*)
Stalker’s Ultracite Gatling Laser 50% DRWA, 10% DWA
Stalker’s Ultracite Gatling Laser Bashing 40%, FMSWA
Suppressor’s 50 Cal MG 50 Limb, 15%FR
Suppressor’s Harpoon Gun Exploding, 1P (Legacy)
Suppressor’s Pitchfork 40$ FSS, Take 15% LDWB
Suppressor’s 10mm SMG 33% Vats, 1A
Fixer Super Mutant Slayers, 33 Vats, 1A
Fixer Executioners 15FR, Vats Crit 50%
Fixer Junkies 25% FFR, 1P
Troubleshooter’s Bow 33 Vats, 250 DRWR
Troubleshooter’s Boxing Glove 40% FSS, 1E
Troubleshooter’s Combat Shotgun 25% FFR, 90% RW
Troubleshooter’s Fire Axe 40% FSS, Take 15% LDWB
Troubleshooter’s LMG 50% Limb, 250 DRWR
Troubleshooter’s Railway 44% Vats, FMSWA
Troubleshooter’s Sheepsquatch Staff 40% MPAD, 1E
Troubleshooter’s Shishkebab 40% MPAD, 1E
Troubleshooter’s Gatling Gun Bullets Explode, 15% FR
Two Shot 50 Cal 90% RW, Bashing
Two Shot Auto Grenade Launcher 25% FFR, 50 DRWA
Two Shot Auto Grenade Launcher 10% DWA, 1P
Two Shot Black Powder Rifle 90% RW, Bashing
Two Shot Black Powder Rifle 50 DRWA, 25% FFR
Two Shot Combat Shotgun (1*)
Two Shot Cryolator 10% DWA, 90% RW
Two Shot Mirv 25 FFR (2*)
Two Shot Mirv 50% Limb (2*)
Two Shot Fatman (1*)
Two Shot Gatling Plasma 10% DWA, 25% Less Vats
Two Shot Flamer 10% DWA, 25% Less Vats
Two Shot Flamer 15% FR, Vats Crit Shot 50%
Two Shot Railway 10% DWA, FMSWA
Two Shot Assaultron Head 15% FR, 33% Vats
Two Shot Combat Rifle 50% Limb, 15% FR
Two Shot Gamma Gun Vats Crit 50%
Two Shot Gamma Gun 25% FFR, 1A
Two Shot Lever 50DRWA, 25% FFR
Two Shot .44 Pistol 10% DWA, 250 DRWR
Two Shot Combat Rifle 10% DWA, 1A
Two Shot Handmade Bullets Explode (2*) (Higher tier trades only)
Two Shot Lever 25% FFR, 15% FR (God roll)
Two Shot Pump 25% FFR, 25% Less Vats
Vampires Bow 90% RW, 33% Vats hit
Vampires Cryolator 10% DWA (2*)
Vampires Gatling Plasma 25 FFR (2*) (Keeps you alive!)
Vampire’s Harpoon Gun 90% RW, 33% Vats
Vampire’s Harpoon Gun Bashing
Vampire’s Auto Grenade Launcher 10% DWA, FMSWA
Vampire’s Mini Gun 25% FR, Vats Crit 50% Damage
Vampire’s Handmade 10% DWA, 90% RW (very nice)
Vampire’s Railway Rifle 25% FFR, 25 less vats (Choo Choo)
Vampire’s 10MM Sub 25% FFR (2*)
Vampire’s Flamer 33% Vats (2*)
Vampire’s Lever 33% Vats (2*)
Vampire’s Pump Shotgun Vats Crit 50% (2*)
Vampire’s Radium 25% FFR, 50 DRWA
Vampire’s Western Revolver Vats 50%, Vats Crit 15% faster (Cowboy)
Vampire’s Handmade 50% Limb (2*)
Vampire’s Radium 10% DWA, Vats Crit Meter 15%
Vampire’s All Star Heated Baseball Bat 40% FSS (2*)
Vampire’s Baseball Bat (1*)
Vampire’s Bone Hammer 50% Limb, 1E
Vampire’s Combat Knife 40% FSS, 1A (God roll)
Vampire’s Fire Axe 40% FSS (2*)
Vampires Fire Axe 40% LDWPA, Reflect 50%
Vampire’s Fire Axe 40% FSS, 15% LDWB
Vampire’s Heated Pitch Fork 40% FSS, 1E (Demonic!)
Vampire’s Heated Pitch For 50% Limb, 90% RW (Demonic!)
Vampire’s Machete 40% FSS, Take 40% LDWPA
Vampire’s Machete 40% FSS, 1A (God roll)
Vampire’s Pitchfork 50% Limb, take 15% LDWB
Vampire’s Revolutionary Sword 40% LDWPA, 50% Limb (Freedom!)
Vampire’s Switch Blade 40% FSS (2*)
Vampire’s Shishkebab 40% FSS, take 15% LDWB
Vampire’s Super Sledge 40% FSS (2*)
Zealot’s Mini Gun Bullets Explode, 25% Less Vats
Zealot’s LMG FMSWA, 25% FFR
Zealot’s Shepherd’s Crook Reflect 50%, 1A
Zealot’s Handmade 50% DRWA, Vats Crit 50%
Zealot’s Radium 25% FFR, 1P
Backpack High Capacity Mod, Bear Arm, Blue Ridge Backpack Plan, Brahmin Grill, Pen, Meat Cleaver, Valley Galleria Signs, Vault 76 Jumpsuit, Vault 94 Stash Box, Ware House Build Set, Wedingo Colossus Skin Rug, Whistle in Dark, Winter Icicle, Lights, Psycho, Stimpak, Super Stimpak, Assorted Lights, Backpack Armor Plated Mod, Backpack Insulated Mod, Backpack Lead Lined Mod, Bed of Nails, Burrows Signs, Caged Bulb Lights, Chally the Moo Moo Backpack, Circus Cage Trailer, Cryo Grenade, Cryo Mine, Spare Fasnacht Plans, Horned Shepherd’s Crook, Marine Wetsuit, Meat Pile, Meat Week Flag, Mounted Gorilla Head, Mounted Honey Beast, Mega Sloth, Mirelurk Hunter and King Head, Mounted Mothman, Plasma Grenade and Mine, Pulse Grenade, Safari Crocolossus Backpack, Shishkebab Extra Flame Jets, Sitting Gorilla, Spiked Shepherd’s Crook, Standing Gorilla, Super Reactor, Vault 94 Jumpsuit, Wendigo Colossus Head, Wendigo Colossus Plushie, X-01 Quantum Paint, Cranberry Relish, Formula P, Hard Lemonade, Lemonade, Overdrive, Pumpkin Pie, S’mores, Tato Salad.
submitted by Dukeofchaos412 to Market76 [link] [comments]

Five Terrifying Minutes on a Baseball Field

Five Terrifying Minutes on a Baseball Field
by [email protected] (Elana Schor) via POLITICO - TOP Stories
URL: http://ift.tt/2sbGRAw
Mass shootings often take on an identity, a characteristic shared by the victims or the scene that gives an increasingly commonplace horror something singular by which it can be remembered—nightclub partiers, gap-toothed schoolchildren, perplexed moviegoers.
So it was on Wednesday at a baseball field in the heart of Alexandria, where an unusual group of Type A personalities had gathered for an hour or so of early morning practice before they headed to their day jobs on Capitol Hill. What happened in the five harrowing minutes after a bitter 66-year-old from Illinois trained his rifle on nearly two dozen congressmen, staffers, lobbyists, security detail, family members and bystanders scattered around the diamond was not the worst shooting in recent American history. Though five people were injured—two critically, including a member of Republican House leadership—no one except the gunman died. But in an exceedingly partisan moment, scarred by withering political rhetoric and violent protest, an apparently targeted attack on a group of Republicans by someone who had posted profane rants against President Donald Trump couldn’t help but become a terrible symbol of a divided country.
But while the shooting mercifully set no records for deaths or injuries, it had the effect of turning a number of men—accustomed to being in charge, accustomed to political combat, accustomed to making decisions that affect millions—into average citizens with an average citizen’s control over daily life. Thirteen of those men—11 representatives, one senator (and one devoted, 81-year-old freelance photographer)—shared their experiences in uncommon detail with Politico. Used to speaking in public, some of them even veterans of actual combat, they spoke with candor and bracing detail, and the kind of emotion that grabs you when the adrenaline has subsided. For once, they were speaking about something they had lived through, not just an act of random violence, from some faraway corner of the country about which someone demanded they comment.
‘It was kind of festive’
Rep. John Moolenaar: We started practice about 6:15. And we kind of warm up and take some outfield practice.
Rep. Jeff Duncan: Alexandria is coming alive, and people are exercising and that’s what they do. It’s not uncommon for us to have interactions with citizens who look in the fence and watch us practice a little.
Rep. Bill Johnson: A lot of joviality. A lot of “We’re going to win.” A lot of energy out on the field. Everybody trying to put forth their best effort. And so it was kind of festive.
Johnson: The last thing I did before I walked off the field and grabbed my bag was to fist-bump Steve Scalise. He was standing over there by home plate getting ready to take his round of batting practice. And as he always does: “See you later.” And the last person I spoke to was Matt Mika. As I was walking out of the gate, he was walking in. He said, “You’re leaving early, Mr. Johnson, you must have an early morning meeting.” I said, “Yeah, I do, I’ve got to cut out a little early.”
Duncan: Ron [DeSantis] plays third base, I play shortstop. We were on the field and we had already taken batting practice, already shagged a lot of balls in the infield, and he said, “When do you wanna leave?” I said, “I can leave now, I’ve already practiced enough. And I can get back to the Hill and make an early meeting.” And he said, “Let’s go.” I said, “Well, let’s let Mike Conaway—Chairman Conaway—was in the batter’s box,” I said, “Let’s let him finish his at-bat and then we’ll leave.” So Conaway finished, they started gathering balls up. DeSantis and I walked off the field. I actually fist-bumped Scalise on my way off the field. And then we get to the parking lot. DeSantis is already in the car. I’m getting in when this guy approaches.
Bergman: We were almost four, five minutes to the end of our practice and kind of winding down. I was standing next to the batting cage next to home plate. It was my turn to hit next.
Duncan: Someone in the parking lot asked me if the team practicing was a Democrat or Republican team. I told him they were Republicans. He said, “OK, thanks,” and turned around. I got in the car and left. That was at 7:02. And the reason I know that is I got in the car and commented about what time it was, knowing how long it was going to take us to get back to the Capitol. One minute, one way or the other, makes a lot of difference in traveling back to the Hill. So I know it was exactly 7:02.
‘As I was running, a round hit to my left’
Marty LaVor: I was standing in front of the first base, probably about 10, 20 feet towards home plate. And I was only watching the right hand batters. I happened to turn and look toward third base. I see this guy, and he wasn’t looking at anybody, but I saw the rifle, and it’s pointing skyward. And so my thought was, ‘Why would anybody be out at 6 o’clock in the morning with a rifle to shoot birds?’
Moolenaar: I went over to the batting cages where we have a machine pitch, and I was going to work out some of my hitting—and it was there where we heard the first shot.
Rep. Barry Loudermilk: Right after I put on my helmet, I heard a crack. I knew it was a gunshot, but it’s so out of place, you’re trying to process it. That was to my left over by third base. Instinctively I just looked over to the Capitol Police detail, Scalise’s detail. They’re always there.
Moolenaar: When the first shot rang out, it really sounded like an explosion. It sounded like a gunshot, but all of us were thinking at 7:15 in the morning, in this pastoral setting, where people of the community could watch us practice and ask questions—we just weren’t thinking about gunfire.
Fleischmann: I heard a large bang ... I didn’t think anything of it, so I didn’t do anything. I didn’t realize it was a gunshot.
Rep. Mo Brooks: I was on deck about to hit batting practice, on the third base side of home plate, and I hear a loud “bam.” And I look around and behind third base ... I see a rifle.
Rep. Gary Palmer: Trent Kelly was at third and [Rodney] Davis was batting and we heard a shot. ... I yelled to Trent “That was a gunshot.” Trent yelled, “I know,” turned and said “He’s got a gun. Run!”
Moolenaar: I went over to the batting cages where we have a machine pitch, and I was going to work out some of my hitting—and it was there where we heard the first shot.
Rep. Barry Loudermilk: Right after I put on my helmet, I heard a crack. I knew it was a gunshot, but it’s so out of place, you’re trying to process it. That was to my left over by third base. Instinctively I just looked over to the Capitol Police detail, Scalise’s detail. They’re always there.
Bergman: I remember hearing somebody say something like, “Shooter!”
Rep. Joe Barton: I was by the first base dugout on the on-deck circle, so I looked down there, and I yelled at Brad, my oldest son, “Just get Jack, and get down.” And they both did.
Brooks: And I see a little bit of a body and then I hear another “blam,” and I realize that there’s an active shooter. At the same time, I hear Steve Scalise over near second base scream.
Palmer: When I heard the shot, I knew, especially the next couple of shots. I knew pretty well he had some type of semi-automatic weapon.
Rep. Mike Conaway: There was a delay. The second gunshot went off. People started running off the field.
Palmer: If he had wanted to, Trent and I could have been his first two victims. We were stationary targets. The staffer on the mound, pitching—Wes, I think he works for Sen. Strange—I mean he was standing on the mound. We were all literally yards from the guy.
Fleischmann: An intense fear grips me that I’m literally a sitting duck. I didn’t see the shooter ... I had no idea other than the shot had come from the direction behind me, the first one. And so I made the conscious decision then to get up and try to run to the first base dugout.
Palmer: As we were moving to find cover, two more shots were fired. One hit Scalise. I saw Scalise get hit and go down. I knew he was hit low. Didn’t know if he was hit in the leg or hip.
Fleischmann: I got up and all I could think was, “I’m going to run and either he’s going to shoot me in the back and shoot me down, or I’m going to make it to the dugout.” … But when I got in there, I got hurt. I hurt my hands, my elbows. I landed on the concrete. I hit my side. I thought I had broken ribs.
Brooks: I ran around to the first base side of home plate. We have a batting cage that’s got plastic wrapped around it to stop foul balls. And hid behind the plastic. You know that plastic’s not real good, and I was lying on the ground with two or three others as gunfire continued ... and there were probably 10, 20, 30 shots fired while two or three of us are lying on the ground seeking cover behind the batting cage.
Moolenaar: Our batting cage, you could hear bullets hitting the metal fence, you could hear the thuds of bullets landing.
Bergman: I went into Marine mode very quickly and literally got into a low crawl and headed toward the back side of the first base dugout. The only safe place was behind it.
Loudermilk: I ran toward the gate to get out of the field. I just wanted to get something between me and the shooter. I couldn’t see him. I knew he was to the left. As I was running off the field a round hit to my left on the ground, and a round hit the fence. So I knew he was targeting us.
Bergman: I was thinking: “I’m in danger. Somebody’s trying to kill me. Somebody’s shooting at me.” The worst fear for a Marine is to be in a gunfight without a gun. At that point, I’m not thinking about my family, I’m thinking about survival. You can’t protect others if you haven’t protected yourself first.
Palmer: We got to the gate—there was only one gate open in the entire field, on the first base side. We got through that and took cover behind a large oak tree.
Loudermilk: I got around the side of the shed. Some of the guys were able to get out of the dugout, some others came over and got behind the shed with us. They stayed there for a little bit. There was a break in the shooting so they ran behind a bathroom, it was a concrete building. There was probably nine or 10 of us around that little shed. Two of us stayed behind because when I got to the shed, I saw Matt Mika laying about 10 feet in front of us. He was already shot, he was lying there.
Conaway: I went over behind the first base dugout, tried to find out where the shooter was. Scalise was down in the outfield. One of the staffers—or lobbyist, he’s down behind a car, he’s been shot in the chest.
Loudermilk: I immediately ran up to where Matt [Mika] was and the gunfire drove us back. And so, I was able to talk to him. He was about 10 feet away. Every time we tried to reach him it would drive us back.
Palmer: Scalise dragged himself off the infield dirt into the outfield grass, about 10 yards. I was yelling at him to stay down.
Loudermilk: Several other shots hit around us. We could see ’em. We could hear them. You could hear ‘em go over your head. One hit the shed we were behind about two feet over my head. So we stayed put, there were fewer targets around us by now because most everyone had been able to get out of there, get out of the area. Some went in apartment buildings across the street.
Moolenaar: There was a woodshed, that wasn’t really a very good barrier. It was very thin wood, and thinking perhaps the vehicles would be a better barrier. But what we realized was the shots were shooting out windows on these vehicles, so I was right behind a vehicle that had been shot out. Miraculously, someone in an apartment right there invited three of us to come inside the apartment.
Bergman: The direction I was going, Scalise would’ve been to my back … Once I got behind the dugout, I had no view of the field.
Brooks: I heard a break in the gunfire and decided to take a chance. Ran from home plate to the first base dugout, which is also cinder block and down two or three feet, so you can get better cover. There were a number of congressmen and congressional staffers, lying on the ground. One of them was wounded in the leg. I took off my belt and myself and another congressman, I don’t remember who, applied a tourniquet to try to slow down the bleeding.
Rep. Roger Williams: They’re real dugouts, they’re about six feet in the ground. And they’re concrete. I just dove into there head first ... like diving in a swimming pool with no water.
LaVor: I heard that sound and I turned and there were other people, other members and staff, running for the dugout. And I was running in back of a congressman who I literally don’t know who it was. And we got to the end of the dugout. He dove in, and I dove in on top of him. I would have been severely injured if I had done the same dive because of the concrete floor. Jumping on a congressman’s back apparently was a little softer.
‘There was blood all over the dugout.’
Williams: I don’t know how long I was there, but all of a sudden, at the top came running in was Zack Barth, who works for me. He dove in and yelled “I’m shot.” And I don’t know, I’ve got to figure this out in my head how God made this work, but he came to me. I mean all of these people—we got together and I held him as Mo Brooks ripped his belt off and Flake and I put a tourniquet on his leg to keep his leg from losing more blood. And then we all just stayed down, yelling at everybody, “Keep your head down,” yelling at Scalise not to move.
Fleischmann: There was blood all over the dugout. Some of that because there was one gentleman there who had been shot in the leg. And other of it was because of people who had jumped in there like me got bloodied up and hurt hitting the concrete.
Williams: In this dugout there were probably 10 of us. But there were generations in the dugout. You had somebody like me, some of the older guys, say the 60-70ish group. And then you had a 10-year old in there, Joe Barton’s son was in there … and there I was with Zack, who works for me, who’s 23, we’re holding each other.
Bergman: Joe Barton was [in the dugout]. I know for sure because his son, Jack, was outside the fence underneath the Suburban. I’m yelling at Jack Barton, Joe’s son, to stay under the truck. As a 10-year-old he was popping his head out, wondering what the hell was going on. “Stay under the truck!” He’d look out. ... I’m used to leading Marines, and in that situation, if you have to tell someone to sit down or duck and they turn around and ask why, they’re dead.
Williams: So Zack [Barth] is shot, he’s bleeding, we’re trying to tie a tourniquet up [for] him, telling him “Keep your head down,” and he’s texting his mother that we’re under attack and he’s doing fine. To me, that’s got some bravery to it.
Bergman: I saw the Capitol Police move toward the gunman. Joe [Barton] and I both hustled, we grabbed Jack [Barton]. We both flew into the dugout. Because now, best scenario, the end of the dugout, the home base side of the dugout was keeping us out of the line [of fire].
Barton: By the time I got into the dugout, I couldn’t see [Jack]. And I said ‘Where’s Jack?’ They had put him under the bench, and then two members had placed themselves in front of him so had the gunman got to the dugout, he wouldn’t have got shot.
Fleischmann: So while we were in the dugout, I kept saying to myself, “Please, please, somebody take this shooter out. Somebody subdue him because he’s continuing to shoot people.”
Brooks: We had people in the first base dugout who were screaming into their telephone that we were under attack and to send help immediately. And I think that’s because of our concern that our security detail may be outgunned.
Fleischmann: While I was in the dugout, I called my chief of staff Jim Hippie. And I remember being so visibly upset, saying, “We’re under attack, please call for help, I’m in a dugout, there’s an active shooter.”
LaVor: Now, once I was in the dugout, I clearly heard the pop, pop, pop, pop. I assume it was eight bullets. And it stopped. Well, because I’m not a rifle shooter, you know, I thought he was finished. And so I started to stand up and look around. A staffer who was in the dugout in front of me, screamed, ‘Get down and get next to the wall.’ Well, he saved my life, because a bullet came past the spot where I would have been looking out, hit the cinder block in the back of the dugout, took out a chunk of cinder block. From that point on, until it was over, I just stared at the dirt on the floor, and I talked to God.
‘There was a different sound to their pistols’
Brooks: In the meantime, I’m towards the right-field side of the dugout and there’s gunfire within about five or six, seven feet of my head. And I look up and there’s a guy with a gun blasting away. Fortunately, it was one of the good guys, one of our security detail who was shooting back. Of course it was pistol versus rifle, our pistols versus the shooter’s rifle along the third baseline just outside the chain link fence, and he was ordering us to stay down.
Moolenaar: You could tell there was a different sound to their [pistols] as opposed to the rifle that the shooter was using.
Conaway: The shooter is actively shooting. Two Capitol Hill police guys are returning fire. They’re trying to find the guy, I’m trying to point the guy out to him. [Shot] ricochets around, goes through a tire, ricochets around, hits a Capitol Hill policewoman in the ankle, so she’s down.
LaVor: Once the Capitol Police became engaged, it was like Fourth of July, where you see everything go off in the last burst. Bing, bing, bing, and it’s all over the sky, and it’s very loud. You could hear the different kinds of sounds but it was non-stop.
Palmer: The gunman moved from the third base side around toward home plate, firing at people, then moved on around to first base side where Capitol police officers continued to engage him. Special Agent [Crystal] Griner was hit in the left leg. I saw her go down with a bullet wound, and she pulled herself, she was lying beside their SUV. She pulled herself into a firing position and continued to engage the shooter.
Loudermilk: The second officer went out and drew fire. He got wounded too. I think it was shrapnel. At that point, I backed off and went behind an oak tree. It was about five feet behind me where I could get a better vantage point. Then I saw the gunman come out carrying a handgun—apparently he’d run out of ammo. He pointed at the officer and [the officer] told him, “Drop the gun, drop the gun.” He took a couple shots at the officer.
Barton: I finally saw one of the security officers rush the shooter with his pistols drawn and said, “Drop the pistol, drop the pistol, put the pistol down,” and when he didn’t do that, I think this is the officer who shot the attacker.
Conaway: About that time the Alexandria police engage, so between them and our one remaining Capitol Hill policeman, the guy is down to his handgun, the guy has dropped his rifle, they shoot him, he goes down. I go over there. They put him in handcuffs.
Fleischmann: The shooter had been subdued and they said it’s OK to get up. I got up, I was bleeding, other people were bleeding. And I remember looking right out toward second base and Steve Scalise was lying there, out in the field. And he was being attended to by that time.
‘Can you call his wife?’
Bergman: After the shooter was down, I headed directly out to the field. Dr. [Brad] Wenstrup was there, Flake was there, Congressman Palmer was there as well. I checked on the rest of the wounded, on Matt Mika. I moved over to within about 20 feet of where the shooter was down.
Palmer: I don’t remember if Brad [Wenstrup] was first out there but he was a doctor. When I got out there, I think it was Mike Conaway and Chuck Fleischmann and a couple other members. Barry Loudermilk got an emergency kit out of the SUV and brought it out. Brad was trying to press on the wound and create a tourniquet. I was digging in the kit trying to find bandages or gauze or whatever we could come up with to stop the bleeding. Brad was fabulous in terms of keeping Steve alert and getting him to drink. Steve was alert.
Loudermilk: I knelt down. [Mika] was still conscious. I put my hand on his head and I prayed for him. And then I asked the officer if she was hit. She was, in the ankle. And I went and got the medkit out of the back of the car. By the time I got the medkit, EMTs were already at Matt. So I took the med kit out to Brad Wenstrup.
Sen. Jeff Flake: As soon as the shooting stopped, that’s when I ran out to Steve, and we applied pressure to the wound to try to keep the bleeding down until the medics arrived. As soon as that occurred, I went to the dugout to get my phone. But one of the staff members grabbed Steve Scalise’s phone and handed it to me and said, “Can you call his wife?” and that’s what I did first.
Palmer: With Steve, when we got out there and were able to get his pants down and see where the wound was, I knew we would have a hard time getting a tourniquet. But while we were waiting, Wenstrup fashioned a tourniquet out of Steve’s belt. Just to increase pressure on the bandages we were applying to the wound. Then the EMT got there and they had a tourniquet that’s for mid-body pressure.
Bergman: I saw [the shooter] down, laying on his right side. A man in his early 50s, stocky build, slightly graying hair. I took a quick look at his face. What I was looking for first was: Did the officers have him safely down so he could not get up and do anything else? I didn’t see any laborious breathing. He was being securely held down. It was a quick call: Was he a threat or was he not?
Palmer: Special Agent Bailey, we sat him down to get a look at him, and he wouldn’t leave Steve’s side. He just kept saying he wouldn’t leave him.
Bergman: [Matt Mika] was right next to the vehicle, he was laying on his back. The paramedics on site were just literally taking his knife and cutting his T-shirt. I got a chance to see the exit wound on the front of his chest. I just kind of looked him in the eye, touched his knee for a couple of seconds, probably said something to him.
Barton: I did call 911, I also called the Capitol Hill police on my cell phone, and as soon as it was apparently safe to get up I checked on everybody who was down and then made a phone call to try to get the Speaker [Paul Ryan] on the phone and let him know what was going on.
Palmer: I didn’t really feel anything until a couple of hours later. It kind of hits you once you’ve had time to think about it. And that’s not bravado, I just think that’s what happens to you in the moment.
LaVor: When my wife finally picked me up, she said, ‘Well, what was happening in your mind? You know, were you pleading with God and everything else?’ And I said, ‘It was the calmest I have ever been in my life.’ I wasn’t nervous, I wasn’t frightened, I was lying down looking at the dirt and talking to God. And I said, at one point, ‘If it is my time to go, I am ready.’ That’s not the way I normally think or talk, although I’m very religious, I’m a churchgoer, I don’t miss. But this was beyond anything I had ever experienced in my life, and I still can’t explain it two days later.
submitted by feedreddit to arableaks [link] [comments]

Batting cages in Adelaide?

I was wondering if any of you guys know of any baseball batting cages with automatic pitching machines in Adelaide, other than The Range at O'Halloran Hill.
I like The Range, but it's a bit far from where I live and I hate riding my motorcycle on Main South Road.
So are there any others or is that it?
submitted by Ardrogen to Adelaide [link] [comments]

Respect Beast Boy (Teen Titans)

"Come on wuss, don't you know how to fight like a man?"
"I'm not a man. I'm an animal!"
When Garfield Logan was a child, getting dragged along by his famous zoologist parents around the world, he unfortunately got bitten by a strange, green monkey, and became deathly ill. His parents desperately sought a cure, eventually finding one by means of injecting their son with a cocktail of animal DNA. Garfield was cured, but his skin and hair had been dyed a permanent green, and he gained the ability to transform into nearly any animal under the sun. And thus, he became Beast Boy.
Shortly after, however, tragedy struck, when Beast Boy's parents were killed in a flood. Orphaned at a young age, Beast Boy only survived by sneaking into the base of the superhero group, the Doom Patrol. Instead of kicking the child out, they were impressed by his abilities, and understood his need for a home, and so he was adopted and trained by them, becoming a superhero in his own right. But the Doom Patrol, especially their leader Mento, had difficulty bridging the gap between Beast Boy his foster son, and Beast Boy the hero and training. A foster son needed support, but a hero needed to learn how to sacrifice what they need to. This lead him to be incessantly tough on the child, eventually alienating Beast Boy into quitting the Doom Patrol and moving to Jump City to try and make it on his own. That is, until he found a new team, the Teen Titans, who could support him much better as a friend and a hero.
Feats are marked by the animal Beast Boy is transformed into as they occur.
SXEY = Season X Episode Y
TLE = The Lost Episode
Tokyo = Teen Titans: Trouble in Tokyo
#X = Teen Titans Go! Issue #X
Transformations
Strength
Speed
Durability
Other
submitted by TheMightyBox72 to respectthreads [link] [comments]

[SF] Pyrite (Fool's Gold)

Hey guys. It's my first time posting here. I hope you like this. Be as brutally honest about it as you can be; I am really trying to improve my writing and techniques. I apologize for the grammatical mistakes.
“Do you believe in God Miles?” it asked. The electronic voice rumbled through the confined air of the apartment, reverberated off the walls and settled into Miles’ eardrums.
The neon lights pierced through his loft’s stretched windows on the cool July night. They illuminated their facades in the dark; Miles in his robin blue egg button down and the android which bore exposed wire and a titanium exoskeleton. It sat in front of the canvas with its hand poised on making perfect outlines for the next magnum opus.
Miles allowed his Adam’s apple to squirm from the top of his trachea to his esophagus, as if he were swallowing the question. It was an android, incapable of producing emotional judgment, but he felt he needed to tiptoe around the question regardless.
“I believe in a god 787,” Miles said. He walked towards the outlined canvas and scrutinized it like a completed work hung in a museum for hordes of tourists to see. Rain pelted the large panes of glass of Miles’ loft. The shadows of streaks of water raced across the laminated wood floors. Besides 787, Miles was completely alone in the apartment and the rain accentuated the fact by filling the rest of his loft with empty shadows.
A green neon sign flared outside the window which brimmed the apartment in a seasick green.
787 spoke.
“Regardless of your belief, there is this theory that a god created the universe.”
It streaked its paintbrush across the canvas, allowing the paint to engulf the small wells of fiber with an inspired sickish green. It continued.
“And in this universe there are only a limited number of artistic combinations. For example, there are only a limited amount of musical notes. Soon the combinations in which they can be arranged will be exhausted.”
The strokes flurried about the fabric. The nauseating green dared not to cross the outlined boundaries. And as the painting came together, it became both discernible and yet far fetched. 787’s titanium hand flickered as it slapped the brush with expertise precision. Miles pressed his thumb against his lips as he absorbed the words and tried to unfurl the mystery as to what 787 was going to give him to unveil to the world as his next masterpiece.
“So we’ll soon run out of music?” Miles said. His mild interest in 787’s discussion was reflected by how he tilted his head towards the canvas, just barely having his chin rest on 787’s shoulder. 787 paused and turned its head to face Miles.
They locked eyes. Miles’ brown irises burned through 787’s empty green ones, exposing the abyss behind the glass-like lens. He thought how he should improve the next model by placing something tangible behind those eyes, because on a rainy night like that one, it gets awfully lonely knowing you are in a room by yourself with a synthetic human mocking human-like features.
“Eventually, yes, you will run out of unique music.” 787 said as its rubber face contorted the words out of its artificial lips.
“And poems, novels, plays, movies follow suit as well. Art will cease to be original and awe inspiring.”
787 dabbed its brush into the hues of royal blue and sangria red to combine into the color it processed in its metallic database secured in its head. The artificial intelligence scribbled with calculated ease.
Miles’ pupils dilated in hopes of enveloping the work in a net of gaze. The corners of his mouth leveled out while his hand hovered just below his bottom lip.
“May I ask you another question Miles?” 787 said without interruption of its rapid brush strokes.
The room vibrated solely on the scrapes of the brush and Miles’ automatic inhales and exhales. Miles heard the question but seemed to not give it as much importance as a question from the reporters who stop by the loft to interview him about his amazing works of art.
“Miles?”
787 halted mid stroke. Its head twisted a clean one hundred and eighty degrees to address Miles’ loftiness.
As the neon signs and advertisements flickered on beyond the window pane, the hiss of tires kissing pavement filled the room. The Mexican standoff of eye contact between human and machine endured as the world beyond that loft carried on. Neon lights flickered on and off leaving the two with brief moments of engulfed darkness. Trickling shadows from the rain waltzed through the bare brick and mortar room.
The only two in the room, yet Miles did not address him.
787 began.
“Did you buy this loft with the money you used selling my paintings Miles?” 787’s face remained stoic.
The question erupted something in Miles. His focused eyes ignited with a radius of pitch black. The carefully positioned hand on his chin balled into a cage of a throbbing veined fist.
“Correct yourself 787. I bought this with the money I earned selling my paintings.”
The duel of eyes reemerged, but now Miles held more volatile ammunition based on his tense and pent up shoulders. His nostrils flared, exhaling hot air which was possibly heated by the burning rage in his chest.
Every thought in his mind raced with shattering 787’s skull with the baseball bat beneath his bed. However, 787 was not done with the painting at hand, so Miles is trying to get a cooler head to prevail.
“But I crafted these paintings myself Miles.” 787’s tone lowered after it recognized the expressions strewn about Miles’ body and face. Its head whirred towards the canvas while it continued to speak.
“Is it right to claim what I created as a product of your craftsmanship?”
“Where are you coming from with this?” Miles said as his voice cracked. His eyebrows furrowed.
“You made me solely so I can make these works of art for you. At first, you told me it was because you wanted to see works of art that the world has never seen before. You couldn’t do it yourself because of your lack of artistic skills.”
787 started its meticulous work blending colors.
The android blended a red that was the same hue as the blush on Miles’ cheeks.
“But after much praise from your friends, you opted to tell them they were your works. You began selling them under your name. You received great attention as you opened galleries and filled your pockets Miles.”
787 placed the final touches on the canvas. Miles paid no mind to it though, as he walked behind the canvas to look at 787’s face. His fingers were curled right in front of his mouth as he thought about pacing backwards towards the bed to retrieve the baseball bat.
It seemed as if this model was aware of things beyond computations and algorithms.
The shoes slid across the varnished hardwood floors as Miles inched backwards.
787 looked up.
“Voila, another work for your impressive collection Miles.”
They both stopped. The only things that were in motion were the shadows of the streaks of rain which raced across the pane and the sound of hissing water breaking down on the asphalt.
“Just today I realized that it seems that you are the only one in the world who has successfully created artificial intelligence, given your impressive degrees from the cutthroat universities you have attended.”
Miles’ heels moved mere millimeters to not tip off 787’s sensitive tracking. His mouth twitched uncontrollably but his poised hand veiled the fear that lined his lips.
“You could have generated more income from selling the patent of my creation, but that is not what you want.” Despite his progress, Miles stopped at the utterance of that statement.
“What is it that I want?” Miles said.
“You want infamy Miles. You want to be regarded among the best.”
787 paused to stand up. Seven feet of titanium hovered high into the stratosphere of the loft apartment. Miles’ eyes tracked the towering metallic giant, tilting his head up to absorb the spectacle.
“Technology goes through a never ending production line of improvement but art is timeless. Artists stay on the tongues of the appreciative long after they ogle their sculptures and oil paintings on Fifth Avenue.”
787 launched the canvas sideways as it crept towards Miles.
The room transitioned in blinks from pure dark to electric colors, bathing the movements of Miles as he reached under his bed. For all of his scrambling, he could not find the bat. Slivers of glimmering metal pierced through the dark and revealed Miles’ legs which attempted to swim beneath the bed for cover.
“Is it true Miles?”
787 shredded the mattress apart with its sharp digits. Flurries of fibers and bed springs momentarily occupied the atmosphere as it settled onto both sides of the floor.
“Is it true that the only reason why you went to school for engineering was because you were good at it?”
787 bore its arm through the box spring, going elbow deep. A muffled squish spurted out of the freshly carved hole.
“You don’t love engineering. You wanted to become an artist. But you were afraid to pursue.”
Blood pooled on opposite sides of the box spring. A soft buzzing orange permeated through the room. Above the box spring, a poised 787 slowly disengaged its limb from the hole. Its exoskeleton dripped in ripe blood. The liquid raced down the metal tubes and coated the wiring of 787, sprinting down towards its chest and even making it as far as its legs.
It looked at its arm; soaked in the appeal of the pomegranate red.
787 picked up the canvas and easel, setting it down before it took a seat.
The optics scanned the work. The scan was complete. The thick blood dripped to the floorboards.
“Given your untimely demise Miles, the price of your work and your reputation in the art community will skyrocket.”
787 placed its palm on the completed canvas, leaving a fresh bloodied print.
“No need to thank me.”
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