This is a story about my Sister-In-Law (SIL), and her Useless Boyfriend (UB).
SIL is my wife's sister, and is a terrific person. UB is decidedly not. In the /ChoosingBeggars section, he's the gift that keeps on giving. Like Chlamydia.
In April of 2020, having lost their jobs due to COVID, they moved in with us rent-free until they get back on their feet. We're happy to have SIL. She's been absolutely terrific, pitching in around the house, spending time with the family, and being my wife's best friend.
This is decidedly NOT true of of UB. He locks himself in their room playing videogames all day long. He complains about the food, only recently agreed to chip in for higher-speed internet which he kept demanding we pay for, and otherwise makes it clear how much of an imposition it is for him to live in our home rent-free.
SIL was finally able to get job a full-time job last month. Their finances are still a mess, but things are improving and she said they'd move out in the Spring. Honestly, we're all going to miss her. UB? the best I can say is I don't care if the door hits him on the way out or not, just as long as he's on the other side of it.
Our oldest son is 23 and moved about 30 minutes away back in fall of 2019 so he could be close to his work. Thankfully, he's remained employed full-time despite COVID. In the fall of 2020, he renewed his lease for one year in a nice (but small) studio apartment.
Recently a fantastic job opportunity arose for our son. He's moving much further away which is sad, but it's a great opportunity and we're happy for him. The largest problem for him is his lease which still has 10 months to go.
He spoke with his landlord, who is a good guy. The landlord said he'd be willing to let our son out of the lease ordinarily, but with COVID he has several tenants who haven't paid rent for a while and he can't afford another apartment generating no income.
He agreed that he would let our son out of the lease the moment he could rent the apartment to someone else, but the market has been really slow and he doesn't know how long that would take. I don't blame the landlord a bit, he's being fair.
Looking to get out of the lease sooner, our son suggested SIL and UB move in. He would move out February 1st , but pay for February and March. They would pick up the rent in April. This would give them two more months to get their finances in order, and he'd only be out 2 months' rent. And as an added bonus, it's closer to SIL's job and would cut 10 minutes off her daily commute. Everybody's happy, right?
Everybody except UB, that is. Looking at the apartment, he complained it was too small. He complained that they'd have to pay for food and utilities (you know, the things he enjoys for free because my wife and I are paying now). He complained he'd have to set up his computer in the living room instead of the bedroom. Then he dropped this little nugget.
"With utilities it's going to be higher. You should pay all our rent, WE'RE doing YOU a favor!"
My son assumed he misheard him and restated his offer. He'd pay for February and March, they'd assume payments in April. Nope. Not good enough. To UB's way of thinking, our son should pay their rent for the remainder of the lease - TEN MONTHS - and let them live there rent free.
SIL was mortified at UB for trying to take advantage of our son (her nephew) that way. After months and months of listening to him complain about his suffering while others paid for everything, she finally had enough.
"UB, I like this place, so I'm moving in... But you're not. When we get home, you're packing your stuff and I'm driving you to your mother's. No more free rides. We're done."
Our son called with the happy news (on multiple fronts) while they drove home. Instead of 30 minutes, they took an hour to get home and we were a little concerned. We called and she confirmed everything was OK. So we assembled the moving boxes for him so he could start packing right away - why postpone the party! He walked in the door to find everything he needed to pack up.
Apparently on their ride back, UB was whining and complaining about their breakup. They stopped to talk for a bit, at which point he said said something (SIL won't say what) that creeped her out, and she asked me to drive him to his mother's, which I was more than pleased to do. We drove about an hour to his mother's place without speaking.
I helped him carry his stuff the porch. Out of politeness, I extended him hand and wished him luck. He stared at me and didn't say a word. There was no, "Thanks for letting me live with you for free for almost a year", or, "Tell SIL I'm sorry." He just stared like the petulant child he is.
SIL is doing really well. We're going to miss her moving away, and especially our son moving quite a distance away. But Useless Boyfriend? We'll miss him about as we will last week's recycling. At least the recycling can be turned into something useful.
​
UPDATE: It was a busy weekend! On Saturday, we helped our son pack and move out to pursue his future. Not going to lie, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Huge, uncontrollable sobs from my wife as he pulled away. We gave him the two months' rent so he doesn't have to eat that expense.
We realized we had completely forgotten about the security deposit. Landlord did a quick walk-through and cut him a check in full on the spot. We gave him a check on SIL's behalf, so everything is now completely in her name.
On Sunday, we helped SIL move in. More sobbing from my wife who has really grown to love having her sister living with us. It was made better by them scheduling all the who-visits-who-when for the week.
SIL has put Useless Boyfriend in the rear view mirror. UB did call her to apologize and try to make things better. I didn't hear the conversation, but he apparently said all the wrong things, because she was only madder by the time she hung up on him. He hasn't called or texted her since.
One key difference - having had a front-row seat for her past break-ups, there was no second-guessing this time. She seems sure this is the right move for her. I think this will stick.
Thanks everyone for the kind words!

Dogs in Space continues...
First, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Twelve
Dangerous Toys (Part Eleven)
When the Director coded for ‘Pest Control’ a thousand AI’s turned their attention to the problem. It was a simple command, a warning that the Galaxy was throwing a new surprise at them and it needed steel and blood to solve. The XCC was the smiling face of humanity. The Director sighed, one day the Xenos would learn that humanity would still have a smile if they had to burn the whole thing down. Normally it was a day like today where one of the Diaspora smelled a rotting corpse somewhere and needed firepower. Humanity had seen the scourged and burned worlds of peoples that had died in cruel innocence and now they carried a variety-pack of sharp sticks to use if needed.
Wellerman Orbital was a prosperous place and its AI was proud of the flood of trade that moved through his ports. He had turned a small dock into a major regional player and he enjoyed that the many Xenos took no thought for their safety or their security in his station. The fact that they didn’t even need to think about it was the proof of his success. He was currently in discussions to found a bank and then came a hidden data burst from the dark that shattered his complacency,
“Wellerman/XCC -coded- Pest Control-Defend/Retrieve-HDF Dangerous Toys. The asset is unguarded. Level Six response Authorised. Order 49857623. Confirm.”
He scrambled back to his training, taking entire micro-seconds to absorb the situation. He reconfigured his Comms and dark-burst his reply. “Order 49857623. Confirmed.”
Shit. He locked down every ship on his station, cancelled every fee held by the traders and offered unlimited free access to the bars and restaurants. He told them that it was an unexpected religious event. He didn’t care if they believed it, he couldn’t allow the Xenos to see what was happening outside. Better to keep them drunk and distracted.
He pulled all his shuttles back to bays that were known to the humans alone and began punching them through a swift transformation. They went from being the helpful Tugs and Fenders into something more worrying as the new modules slammed into place. By the time a mixed collection of humans had arrived to board them, they were met by his Avatar. He looked around and wondered, I mean it had been less than thirty minutes since he had called a free bar on the Orbital, how could so many of them be drunk already?
“All right, I know you’re pissed. Take your plan B and sober the fuck up. None of us expected to be going into a battle today, and with a bit of luck, we won’t need to. We have an unarmed ship out in the dark that we need to get home. All I have is a name but I can tell you now that the ship holds an Engineer and two dogs.” His ragged crew perked up. Wellerman shook his head. Humans and their dogs. He had thought about opting out of the Canine Alliance but perhaps not. He continued, “I have five ships ready to go and that will have to do. Sorry folks but I’m sticking an Avatar on every one since none of you has a Captains rank. Check your Comms for your berth and get aboard. We are leaving in fifteen minutes and I want Comms, Nav and Weapons manned. Welcome aboard.” Across the Orbital, anyone looking for their missing human crewmates was stonewalled by a flat refusal to discuss their strange absence from free beer.
Patrica ended the call and faced the Captain. “Ignore Oscar, Captain. I’m the only one on board with an HDF rank and my name is now on the transponder. This is still your ship. We do need to get to the closest Human Orbital because this ship can barely swat flies as it is. Permission to do something about that, Sir?”
/Longnose/ hesitated. What were these humans? “I thought humans were forbidden from weapons? What is going on exactly Engineer?” His thought was interrupted by his Comms as his bank registered a deposit that...that answered his questions. “Of course Patrica, I’ll see to the crew but what are you expecting? Why…” He looked at the numbers,”...this?”
The Engineer nodded, “Not on our own ships, Sir. As to the rest, well it could look like humans had just seized your ship and we don’t want that. My government would rather that you and your investors got suddenly wealthy than we look like pirates.” She smiled at the Captain, “Don’t worry, if I’m wrong they will take it out of my paycheck, not yours.” Her tone grew grave, “I don’t think this is over. Someone out there just lost a lot of money and they know exactly where we are. Welcome to the HDF. I’ll be in Engineering.” She saluted and left the Captain to work it out for himself.
Patrica walked through the silent bridge, followed by the gazes of the crew. She nodded to them and left it to the Captain to explain. Deep in her heart, she didn’t believe this was over yet and even with a hold full of imprisoned criminals she knew someone out there was going to be looking for blood. She stopped at her cabin to grab Lokis bits and pieces. Loki watched, aware that the mood of the ship was different, /NewHome?/Sadness?/ScentofhappyPack/’. Patrica knelt to her dog and wrapped her arms around him, /PackHunted/EngineerGuarding/ScentofhappySafe/. Loki sniffed, his tail low. He pressed into Patrica and let out a low whine that needed no translation. She rubbed behind his pointy ears, ‘/BetterSoon/TreatsforEveryone/’. Time to go to work. Together the two of them headed to Engineering, an odd pair trying to guard their pack.
She sealed the door and pushed down her HUD. She was pretty sure the room was clear but she had enough surprises recently. As she spread out Loki's blanket and let him settle she called Oscar. “Well, it looks like I’m back in the Fleet. I want you to update our security access - the new codes will be in the metadata and cross-check our hardware against the best the Fleet have come up with. I want engines, shields and scanners as our priority. We don’t have time to build a weapons system from scratch but apply the Eell's doctrine to our transporters. We might get lucky. I need a work schedule for myself and a training schedule for the crew. I’ll be running shields and weapons from down here so I can keep an eye on them. Let me know what you come up with and we’ll go from there.”
Oscar felt more doors open in his database, doors that he didn’t even know were there and plans, instructions and strategies poured out. The latest designs with annotated versions of his ship-systems. His ship and crew weaponised in a way that he had never dreamed possible. “Engineer, my database has expanded. This was encoded before we boarded the ship. I am confused. Did you suspect this was a likely outcome?” Patrica was already disassembling the shield console, “Hmm...no Oscar, every AI gets the same package. You know how humans feel about information. It’s just restricted to prevent overload in your early days.” She paused with the plasma lance in her hand, “Normally you wouldn’t be getting the keys just yet but you aren’t the first. Space can be a bastard.”
Oscar matched her statement with his ethical understanding of Patrica. “Do you not fear that I, or any human AI could be taken by force? The database is...extensive.” Patrica shook her head and went back to work. “To get close to that database we would all have to be dead and you would have blown the ship. No one has ever taken an AI alive and no-one ever will.” She left it at that and went back to her work. Oscar took the hint and began applying his new software and sending his drones out to work on the exterior. His first days in the world were proving interesting.
Out in deep space, a force of thirty ships was hunting the Dangerous Toys. Technically they were called the Recovery Initiative Fleet but only because Murderous Henchmen sounded crude. They were pretty relaxed since they were been sent against a cargo ship that didn’t know they were coming. The Fleet Commander was more worried about the man that had sent the orders, a man not known for his tolerance of failure. Or anything really. Better to do the job, take the money and hope you never hear from him again. He looked at his Navigation, “Have we found them yet? I thought we had co-ordinates.” The navigator hesitated, “Sir, I have the Dangerous Toys but something is wrong. It has a new Captain, a human, and a new designation. Its a part of the Human Defense Forces now.” He pulled up the transponder readings, “Sir, that ship is now designated a diplomatic scout for the humans. They get really...awkward about anyone interfering with those ships. Like declare war and flatten your Fleet awkward. Maybe you should call home?”
It took a few moments to begin the tortured chain of Comms before the Commander was speaking to Incice. “Sir, I’m happy to attack on your orders but I thought you should be aware of the possible consequences. This is going to be a lot bigger than a lost cargo ship.”
Incice was already pacing the room. One fucking human and now he was nearly at war over a training ship. He hissed to himself as a plan evolved in his head. “Commander, I want you to separate ten ships from your fleet and send them in for the kill. They will be paid a triple bonus for the attack. You will stand away until the attack is over and then ‘destroy’ the ‘Pirates’. Tell them to hit the lifeboats as soon as the Dangerous Toys is dead and burning and pick our crews up. I’ll sell it as heroic. I’m sure you’ll get a medal.”
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My Patreon, if anyone wants to support my writing... You can drop into my channel at Discord or buy me a coffee. 'Dangerous Toys' is up to part Fourteen on Patreon.

Hello everyone! I’ve been a long-time lurker here since I discovered FIRE back in 2014, but I’ve rarely posted. I hit $1 million earlier this year, and I wanted to share my story and hopefully exchange some valuable insights with you. It has taken me a while to work up the courage to share, but here goes. I’ll try to keep it fairly short and simple, although I apologize in advance for the long Background section, and I’ll follow up with more details as they come up in the discussion.
TL;DR: I’m 34, single, watch collector, no children (and don’t plan on having any if I can help it). My NW reached ~$1 million at the end of August 2020. I increased my liquid net worth from zero to $850,000 in 6.5 years, and I aim to reach my FI number of $2.5 million by age 41. I don’t hate my job, but I do hate that it keeps me from staying fit and active, so the sooner I become FI the better. Look at my charts. Ask me questions or for more charts. Thank you for reading!
Background
I grew up middle class in a developing country (Middle East) as an only child. I was privileged to have parents who were more than willing to forego most pleasures in life—including travel, nicer cars, etc.—and to instead spend every penny they had to make sure I received the best education possible. They put me in a private American school and paid for my college education, but they also were not the absolute savviest with money.
My health and education came first for my parents, but what came a very close second was every little whim and desire I had as a child—they spoiled me. They almost never invested, and instead spent all their extra money on whatever clothes, computers, videogames, music CDs, cameras or extra pocket money I wanted as a teenager. They found it very hard to say no to me. Because of this I grew up not knowing or appreciating the value of money, and by the time they (involuntarily) retired in their 50s they had virtually no savings.
What’s done is done, right? By the time I woke up to all this in 2013, I was 26 years old and armed with a pretty good education, but I hadn’t exactly been all that successful since graduating in 2008. I had gotten my CPA back in 2009 and was working at a public accounting firm making a measly $12,000/year (yes, that low, because developing country).
I hated my job, mainly because of the people I worked with, but I won’t get into that in any great detail. There was just a big gap between the way I had learned to work in a private/American education and the way I had to work ‘out in the real world’. I also had not been promoted in several years because I was seen by my peers and supervisors as a poor team player.
Anyway, in early 2014, everything changed! Thanks to the way my education and career start looked on paper—and thanks to LinkedIn Premium which I was (and still am) paying $30/month for—I was headhunted for a financial controller position in an east African country. This of course meant leaving my family, my city and my friends, and starting all over. To me this was all very new and scary, but it was almost a complete no-brainer. The move was to propel me from $12,000/year to $75,000/year + all the benefits that come with an expat position.
One thing that made it even easier for me to work abroad was my U.S. citizenship, which I got from my father’s side of my family. Anyway, I packed everything that mattered to me in a few suitcases and got on a one-way flight. My liquid net worth was negative at the time; I had $25,000 worth of credit card debt, plus more owed to my parents. I paid it all off within a few months of moving, but my parents later refused to let me pay them back what they’d contributed for an apartment back in my hometown. The apartment cost about $115,0000 and they’d paid for half of it. I still own it.
Since I made that move in 2014, I have made two more moves to other countries, and I’ve grown to quite enjoy my job and responsibilities. I’ve been promoted three times, and each promotion or move has come with a salary bump. I am now a CFO and my income has steadily climbed from the $75,000 in 2014 to $110,000 now in 2020. In addition to that, I get a ~30% performance-based bonus, and a 6% retirement benefit, plus company-paid housing, furniture, utilities, car, gas, internet, phone, house help, gardener, and two flight tickets home per year.
I’m fairly happy with how I’ve done over the past 6 years, but I look back and I still think to myself: What if I hadn’t been so spoiled? What if I’d learned the value of money earlier in life? What if I’d saved my money and started investing at the age of 21 instead of 27? Where would I be now?
Current financial position
I have an insane Excel spread sheet I’ve been developing and using for the last 6 years. I track every dollar I make or spend, every stock I buy, and hundreds of metrics. I do it religiously, and it’s made it very easy to pull numbers out to share with you guys.
In this chart, my total net worth over time is in orange, and my liquid net worth is in black. The green line is my stock portfolio.
This table breaks down my current net worth near the end of 2020 and each of the previous 6 years. I’ve kept things pretty simple and my stocks are split between two individual accounts with two brokerages—there’s no 401k or IRA of any kind. As a U.S. citizen with no home base in the U.S., I get to exclude much of my income under the FEIE rule, but it also means I can’t contribute anything to a tax-advantaged account.
EDIT: Several of you have pointed out an error I've made in the original chart and table. I erroneously included in my illiquid net worth (from 2014 to 2016) a separate property that my parents owned until 2016. I was tracking the value of that property in my spreadsheet before it was sold in 2016, but it was never a part of my own net worth and it shouldn't have made its way into the table and chart.
I've updated the table and chart. Thanks for pointing out this error!
These are currently my 6 largest stock positions:

Stock	% Gain	Value
TSLA	+411%	$ 100,400
NFLX	+43%	$ 79,800
AAPL	+51%	$ 77,000
FB	+281%	$ 61,200
AMZN	+104%	$ 48,100
MSFT	+62%	$ 39,300

This chart shows my income and how much of it I have spent/saved since 2014. I had a particularly low savings rate in 2016 and 2017 because in those years I pursued (and paid mostly out of pocket for) an expensive top 20 MBA degree. I find out more and more every day that this degree is (and will probably continue to be) completely useless to me, and that the ~$85,000 I spent on it would have been much better invested in the market. My CPA is what I need for my job, and my company never cared whether I got an MBA degree.
You can also see evidence of a fair amount of lifestyle creep between 2018 and 2020 in the chart below. In some years I travelled more than others, but generally my living expenses now hover around the $25,000/year mark.
I’ve also been very fortunate to have invested during the recent insane bull run, and this chart shows just how much it has helped my net worth over the last couple of years.
You can see in the chart that as of now near the end of 2020, I have invested a total of $300,000 into the stock market, and my portfolio’s estimated value at 12/31/2020 is $680,600. This makes for a total return of 121%, and I’ve calculated an annualized return of over 50% based on the timings of each of my deposits into the brokerage account.
The way forward
I feel that I’ve had a great deal of success over the past years, and I attribute most of it to a great ability to save thanks to the way my compensation has been structured and the FEIE. I do, however, recognize that the current market conditions which have allowed my net worth to climb as rapidly as I show in the table below will not necessarily last.

Year	Net Worth
2014	248,300
2015	309,400	+25%
2016	252,600	-18%*
2017	379,700	+50%
2018	457,100	+20%
2019	676,000	+48%
2020	1,071,000	+58%

*Large decrease in NW due to severe drop in Dollar value of property valued in a foreign currency which suffered severe valuation in that year.
I’ve calculated my FI number at $2,500,000, which I believe would allow me to live comfortably and be able to spend up to $80,000/year in today’s dollars, adjusted for inflation. Based on my current and expected future salary, as well as my expected future savings rate. I’ve also calculated that I can likely achieve my FI number at age 41. Some of my assumptions include a 49-year retirement, average inflation of 2.6%, an annual contribution to my investments of $110,000 (adjusted for inflation), pre-retirement market return of 7%, post-retirement market return of 6%, fixed income return of 5.5%, percent in equities is 110-age (so it changes every year), and annual expenses of $80,000, which decline by 2%/year after age 65.
I guess one other thing I'm grateful for is that I'm not stuck in a loop trying (and failing) to get rich quick like I see some of my friends doing. I'm glad I'm taking the slow and steady path, and that I have the patience and discipline for it.
I’m very happy to get into discussions and answer questions. There are many more charts, calculations and concepts I’d love to discuss and share. The only things I do not want to be asked are 1) what countries I’ve lived/worked in, and 2) what companies I’ve worked for. Thanks for understanding.
Thank you all very much for taking the time to read my story, and I’d love to hear your comments!
EDIT 2: Thank you to everyone who has read my post and engaged in a meaningful exchange with me. Whether we agreed or not, I appreciated the discussion. And thank you, strangers, for the wholesome awards!

I sell cars, I also work for a very corporate-run dealership that has a lot of rules, and depending on the level of management depends on their ability to discount blah blah right. I've also been with this dealer for a really long time so I know how to play the game. It can be a PITA at times but if you learn how to play your cards right you can take advantage of their rules.
Now we have a rule
Once a new car hits 90 days we start doing two things

• We offer bonus to the sales person who sells it
• We discount the car to move it

The idea if we want to move our old inventory first
So I'm chilling and I get a call, a guy is on a business trip and says he sees we got a truck he likes. I look it up and I notice its been on our lot for over 140 days. It doesn't have a clearance discount on it. I give him the price I"m able too and he asks me if I have any wiggle room since its a 2020 and not a 2021.
I go "Would $500 do it?"
He counters me roughly another $200 to bring it below a certain price point
I ask "If I agree will you give me a depost right now?"
He goes "Yea"
I go "You know yea I'll do it lets do a deal"
Now the reason why I said $500 is because I know its the maximum amount my sales manager can discount a vehicle without approval. When he countered me above that I knew it was going be a fight to get the deal accepted but I figured giving a customer a $700~ discount is better then giving him a $2,000 clearance discount.
We do the deal, he signs it, I send the deal up for approval. My manager yells at me, tells me I can't do the discount. I explain that its an aged unit, its supposed to have a clearance discount and it doesn't so we should just do it. He says customer has to agree to a higher price.
I go fine I'll talk to him
So I walk outside, play on my phone, answer some emails come back and go "customer says honor the deal or refund him his money"
Manager goes "Can't do it, refund the money" I go "okie dokie"
So I don't refund the money, but I drop the unit back in stock. I call up a higher level manager and point out that he screwed up and didn't do anything about this aged inventory.
He thanks me for pointing it out and says we'll do $1,500 off and see how quick it sells. I ask "What about a bonus?" he goes "If you sell it I'll give you a $150 bonus" I go "Fanstastic" now I work for a dealer that doesn't pay me a % but a set amount per car so this discount isn't cutting into my commission.
I call the customer up and I say "hey Mr. customer, I didn't notice it but this morning the truck you did a deposit on was included in a clearance list, I'm going give you the clearance discount and your price is now approx $800 lower" customer is super happy, thinks I'm the best guy ever. I'm smiling cause I just made an extra $150
Later that afternoon my manager comes in and goes "Sting did you drop that truck back in stock" I said "No customer is going buy it" he goes "O he agreed to a higher price?" I smile and go "nope, I got a clearance discount on it" my manager smirks at me and goes "You got a bonus too didn't you?" I smiled and said "Sure did"
Malicious compliance is my dealership refused to do the common sense thing, and give a customer a $700 manager discount, so instead they gave me a $1,500 clearance discount and $150 bonus.

This might not be of much practical use to most of you, but I though it might be interesting to see the experience of an outsider. Especially as I am one of those evil anti-smoking expats that the community at 20min warned you about.
Originally posted here.
EDITED I clarified a few points that came up in the comments. So if a comment looks like they didn't read the text they actually did.
It is now just over 5 years since I (32/male) moved from the UK to Switzerland. There have been many surprises along the way. I moved here with a 1 year temporary contract and had vague plans to work, see the country at weekends, and then move on elsewhere after. During this time I have moved house, moved job, been unemployed for a few months, explored the country, met and worked with Swiss people from various parts of the country and Expats of various backgrounds, oh and gotten married to a Swiss person.
This is not an all out guide (there are plenty of those), more my reflections and a few lessons learned.
I have posted before after 1 year and after 2.5 years.I have also written pretty extensively about travelling here and Switzerland in general – an overview post of all that is here.
---Resources---
I came in knowing practically nothing other than a frantic check of anything I needed to do to avoid being kicked out.

• The book “Living and Working in Switzerland : A Survival Handbook” by David Hampshire, is very useful.
  
• Various dedicated websites with more serious official information sem.admin.ch, and Ch.ch, and to an extent websites like SwissInfo.
  
• Various websites with more unofficial but helpful information. The EnglishForum.ch is a treasure trove of information and experiences. But there are endless other places like Newlyswissed, and Swiss and Chips that vary between useless fluff and very useful info.
  

---Why and how---

• I did a PhD in the UK and as I was finishing it up and looking for a PostDoc I basically just got a job here in a place I had never heard of through chance by a chain of contacts. I had been looking to move abroad but for some reason Switzerland had never occurred to me.
  
• Initially I arrived on a 1 year contract with Firm A, with the strong likelihood of it being extended to 2 years. It ended up as 2.5, by which time I was moved in with my girlfriend and I was set on sticking around. Job hunting was slower than I expected, so before starting on a new position at Firm B I applied to unemployment benefits for what turned out to be just a month (not sure I need to be so secretive really, but why not).
  
• I basically just moved with my laptop and as much clothing as I could fit in a 60L backpack. I didn’t botheforgot to declare anything (not that I brought anything of any value with me).
  
• I got lucky with housing, but that could have been the biggest problem. Initially I had been expecting to stay at a flat rented by the company for a month or two until I found my own place. This got cancelled at the last minute and I found myself trying to find a flat to move straight into. In the end I staying at a hostel for a week and moved into a shared flat found through WGzimmer.ch before the end of the week. There are not many shared flats where you can quickly jump in compared to the UK, and applying for a flat of your own often feels more like applying for a job or dating with the process dragging on for much longer than the “You like it? OK pay the deposit and sign here” method in the UK. Starting early and getting help from your company is certainly advisable there. The only time I ever use my Dr title is on job and housing applications.
  

---Bureaucracy, Rules, and Paperwork---
I had feared this would be a slow and complicated torture, but to date this has all been very quick, easy, and painless. In large part probably because I had a job already, I was an EU citizen, and I had an address lined up quickly. I know it gets more complicated for non-EU citizens.

• Dealing with the local authorities has always been fast, efficient, and friendly. Other than collecting my residency permit every so often when a contract has been renewed I have only had to deal with them very periodically, but any phone call or visit has taken no more than 20 minutes with very little waiting. This might just be because I live in a small city – maybe in Zürich or a tiny village it is different.
  
• I had a slight delay in getting my permit and bank account activated as I waited for the landlord to approve my place as subtenant and give me a contract for proof of address (despite the fact I was already living there). This didn’t create any problems, my firm just gave me an envelope stuffed with bank notes for my first payment.
  
• Setting up a PostFinance bank account was easy (even with a language barrier then). 20 minutes of filling in a form and showing a few documents.
  
• Despite the reputation for rules and order I have not noticed much difference to life in other industrialised western countries. If anything it is more relaxed in many ways. There are some stricter rules like having to use pre-taxed bin bags or minimal noise on a Sunday, but these are mostly reasonable enough. It is nice not hear endless lawn mower engines on a Sunday afternoon. The only rule that seems pointless is having to tie up paper in a perfect bundle for recycling. Maybe if I ever try and build a house or plan an extension the rules will get more complex and painful.
  
• You are supposed to swap your driving licence within a year, or unable to drive in Switzerland and be made to repeat the test again if you want a Swiss licence. I didn’t apply at first given that I never intended to drive here or stay much longer at first. When I did apply after 2.5 years through the standard process (just to see what would happen) I actually did just get given a Swiss licence without being asked to go through the whole testing process.
  
• The mandatory health insurance is easy enough to set up with all the big companies offering English support. I have mostly done the bare minimum I need to do here and have yet to start being truly Swiss and chasing the best deal every year. The cost is painful, but the health care system has always been efficient and effective for me.
  
• Tax was originally paid at the source (as is standard for foreign workers up until you are on a C permit) which made life very easy there, but now being married and treated as a combined legal entity I am paying tax through the standard method.
  
• Going through the marriage process was also easy. Being an EU citizen marrying a Swiss citizen helped. There was some confusion when they asked for a statement from the UK govt saying I was not married as this apparently has not been given out in years, but a quick chat resolved that problem. A British friend who married a non-resident Russian had a much harder time.
  

---Money---

• I make roughly 100k CHF per year. This is more than decent by Swiss standards. Given my education and experience I could get more in another firm/position here, but I am happy with my workplace and would be very reluctant to give up my scenic riverside commute by bike.
  
• Saving money has not been a problem. Even bearing most of the household costs with a studying partner. Not having a car, pets, kids, or eating/drinking out much helps there. My main non-essential expense is the general train pass and food/accommodation costs for weekends around the country.
  
• The high prices take some getting used to at first, but when you work here it isn’t so bad (once you learn to stop converting them back to your native currency). The positive side is that when you leave Switzerland everything is suddenly so cheap.
  

--- The Swiss ---
I like the Swiss.

• I have never had any problems with the Swiss; despite the number of comments I see online bemoaning the fact that whilst Switzerland is a beautiful country it would be terrible to live in as the locals hate foreigners. I have never had a moment of hostility and experience less general rudeness than I would expect back home in the UK (even with language/culture barriers to push the patience).
  
• I am however white, from a north-western European country which doesn’t have many expats in Switzerland, and educated (outside the expense of the Swiss people). So I am probably not going to be the target of much racism or xenophobia.
  
• Whilst not the warmest people in the world there is a certain friendliness, especially in informal situations. Put a Swiss person in the countryside and they will be friends with anyone. In rural restaurants especially sharing a table with strangers and saying hello/goodbye to everyone there as a whole is standard practice.
  
• I am amazed by how relaxed and trusting they can be. Once for example whilst eating outside at a quiet restaurant I asked for the bill and a coffee, the owner left the restaurant wallet on the table with me and went to get the coffee. Likewise I went to a bike shop I had never been in before, said I was interested in quickly testing a 3000 CHF mountain bike and they just handed it over and told me to have fun - no request for ID or anything.
  
• I am also more on the introverted side so a quieter and orderly country is probably more my sort of place than some of the commenters.
  

---Making friends---
My friendship group is a mix of Swiss and other expats. It is easier to integrate with other expats, though I find that the younger generations of Swiss are much more open than the old jokes of knowing a Swiss person from birth or for 40 years to be their friend would suggest.
Moving in with a Swiss man of my age right away made this much easier. I basically got an instant friend and guide to all things Swiss.
---Language---
I have written fairly extensively about Swiss-German before. Though I do like Swiss-German and I much prefer High-German with a Swiss accent to the standard German High-German.

• I had some very basic German in the distance past from school. Then started learning before I arrived. Now I am B2/C1 with German and (very slowly) working towards A2 with French, with the aim of having at least some very basic Italian.
  
• Oddly even living in a German speaking area it can be hard to use it, especially now not being out and about much. My work is in English and it is conducted between workers in German or whatever language most people in the meeting speak (which is typically English), my home life is mostly English as I met my wife when I didn’t speak much German and we got too used to speaking English together.
  
• I didn’t need to get a language certificate (still don’t really). Partly I put it off thinking I would wait until the next level, and partly that the grammar and me are not friends. In the end the updated rules for my canton meant I needed evidence of my language skills to get a C permit rather than just staying on the B. So I have finally taken and passed the TELC B2 exam for German which more than covers everything I need (including citizenship). Long term I am thinking about aiming for certificates for C1 in German, B1 in French, and A2 in Italian – but those would just be to help set goals rather than be requirements.
  
• The Swiss are very patient with language. I got one or two comments from shop workers that I should learn German if I was going to live here at first – but nothing that felt like it had any bad intention or resentment to it. If anything I have a problem getting the Swiss to speak German with me, many of them will switch to English as soon as they get a hint of my accent. I expect that in a touristy area like Interlaken, but it happens everywhere from the butcher to a remote farmhouse restaurant in the Jura. I am never quite sure if they are being polite, want to practise their English, or can't stand the idea of dealing with High-German.
  
• As noted above English is very widely spoken.
  
• If you live in a city and work in an international workplace then knowing the local language isn’t really needed. Once you have a flat and bank account all the interaction you need is self-service machines at the supermarket (and even those you can set to English). Though I certainly don’t recommend doing that.
  
• It is natural to think that everyone here speaks German/French/Italian fluently (and maybe some Romansch), but that is far from the case. Some do have all 3, many are fluent in 2, but very often English is the preferred common language outside of their mother tongue. Likewise the way the language regions tend to have very hard borders without much overlap was a bit surprising at first. I often find that French speakers would rather (or can only) speak English rather than German.
  
• Being in a country with multiple languages will never get boring. Especially somewhere that actually is bilingual like Biel where it isn’t uncommon for a shopkeeper to forget what language they were speaking to you in and switch from German to French.
  

---Surprises---

• Those bastard fancy landscape photos didn’t show the fog did they? From September to February temperature inversion means that much of the low lying middle of Switzerland can be sat in/under a thick fog. How bad this is varies by location; some places barely get any whilst others turn into Silent Hill for weeks on end. Already shorter winter days can be shortened by hours as the light is swallowed. The plus side is that above the fog you get super clear views, but it gets depressing after days of daily life sat inside it.
  
• The country is much livelier than I expected. The stereotype of a grey serious place might have been true decades ago but certainly isn’t now. Especially in summer there are constant music festivals, lively bars, and flotillas of people floating down the rivers in inflatable flamingos. Granted it still isn’t Latin America.
  
• I was not prepared for Swiss-German, my then basic German knowledge didn’t stand a chance. I have been working on this and managed to put together as comprehensive collection of resources as you are likely to find anywhere for Swiss-German.
  
• Sometimes it feels like being back in time. Shops close early (or don’t open at all on Sunday) and at some cinemas they pause the film and have a 10 minute intermission. Things that went away in the UK before I was born.
  
• The Swiss love to shake hands. For me they are something for the first time you meet someone, or maybe for professional acquaintances you see infrequently. Not for everyone in your group of friends at the start and end of the evening. Kids shaking hands with the teacher everyday is still a strange concept to me.
  
• The Swiss see summer as BBQ season in a way that makes the Aussies look like amateurs. I have seen people lighting up fires on tiny balconies in Zürich to BBQ on.
  
• How much there is outside of the Alps. Maybe it was my ignorance before, but I was surprised by how many beautiful spots there are even in the topographically boring parts of the country.
  

---My Swiss Achievements---

• Aromat on the table.
  
• Making a fire in the countryside to roast a cervelat.
  
• Phoned the police to lodge a nose complaint (the Bünzli award). It was 2am on a weekday and the 5th night in a row. I haven’t started to phone the police because my neighbour sneezed too loudly on a Sunday (yet....).
  
• Raclette grill and Fondue caquelon in the kitchen.
  
• Waking up at 3am for the Morgestraich in Basel and tolerating other parts of Fasnacht like bands outside my window at 2am on a Tuesday morning.
  
• Swimming and floating in lakes and rivers during the summer.
  
• Visiting more places in Switzerland than most Swiss people I know. A new country is always more interesting than your own backyard in fairness.
  

---Why I am still here---
I certainly never thought I would be here 5 years later, but I am very happy to still be around.

• It is a beautiful and safe county with nice people, high quality services and infrastructure. Having put in the effort to understand the culture and learnt the language is an incentive too.
  
• I keep finding work. The Swiss level income is a nice bonus, but it really isn’t the thing that is driving me to stay here. I am not very career driven, so long as I have enough money to enjoy myself and find the work interesting enough I am happy.
  
• The thing I would find hardest to give up is the freedom of the landscape. The extent of the paths and smaller roads around the country that are open to anyone is amazing. Making it so easy and carefree to get out and anywhere, especially by foot or bike.
  
• It is much more varied than you would expect. Both in landscape and culture there is plenty of different things to see and take in so there is always something interesting to do.
  
• I also dislike driving, so the extensive public transport system is fantastic.
  
• The self-service machines in Supermarkets are actually used in addition to normal checkouts rather than a replacement. And they actually trust you and don’t weigh your goods and shout at you if anything is 1g out of place. It might sound like a strange point to be so happy about, but compared to the UK shopping experience these days it is so nice.
  

---What I dislike---
Not much.

• Less smokers and more Australian like rules on smoking would be very nice (eg: no smoking in areas where people are eating, including outdoors). It would be nice to sit down on a terrace at a restaurant and not worry if a chain smoker is going to sit down at the table next to you.
  
• I still have problems quickly picking the right coin out of a pile of change. Why half of them have to be so similar is beyond me, especially when the notes are so vivid and clear.
  
• More exotic food and longer shop opening times would be nice (seeing the supermarkets closed at 18:30 was a hell of a shock at first) but I have gotten used to that. I don’t demand 24 hour shopping, but until 20:00 would be fantastic.
  
• Jobs are mostly advertised without a salary, which you then discuss in the interview. For me at least this is rather awkward.
  

---Regrets---

• Not getting a language certificate earlier.
  
• Not joining a social club. I have looked but nothing has taken my fancy.
  

---Changes with time---

• I have gotten too used to the landscape. I still admire the view from the train window, but it is never as special or exciting as during the first few months.
  
• My town has seen a dramatic increase in English speakers. Mostly due to the growth/arrival of a few big MedTech firms.
  
• E-bikes are increasingly everywhere. I had never seen one before I arrived and was surprised to see them all over town back in 2015. Now they are all over the countryside too with mountain E-bikes being very common in places that were previously only the domain of the most hardcore riders.
  
• The climate seems to be getting warmer and drier every year. The amount of snow in the flat land isn’t that different to the UK these days.
  
• The amount of rubbish and anti-social noise (especially blue-tooth speakers) seems to be getting worse. People seem especially unable to bother carrying their empty cans and disposable BBQ with them from the riverside during summer. The increasing number of people (not even just teenagers) who need an absurdly loud speaker at all times is sad, thankfully it isn’t common in the countryside (yet).
  

With crypto booming and lots of people having double digit profits scammers will try to take advantage of unknowing/new investors. In this guide I will discuss the most common crypto scams out there and where to look at.
1. Fake Exchanges/Wallets/support:
If you want to get some crypto, you have to go to an exchange. Most exchanges offer some type of promotion for their customers from time to time incentivizing them to trade. There are scammers out there who create a seemingly legit looking exchange and try to lure in new customers with 'bonuses' which are too good to be true like 'get 0.1BTC for free!'. To get this bonus you usually have to deposit first to 'unlock' the free coins. Once you deposit on that exchange your money will be gone, even though it looks like it's still there. Sometimes scammers copy wallets from legit coins and get the app listed on the Google play store, when you put in your seed phrase or deposit you're handing over your wallet to them. To draw attention to their fake exchanges/wallets scammers sometimes use fake support members pretending to be from Binance or another large exchange on social media.
To prevent getting scammed by these methods do the following:

• Never disclose your private key!
• Don't click on emails containing suspicious links
• Double check the URL
• Don't interact with 'support members' on social media, use the official support line (from reputable exchanges)
• Go to the official site of the coin you want to buy, they almost always recommend using a certain wallet.

2. Phishing:
Thanks to technological developments phishing scams are largely prevented by parties like Google filtering out spam email, but some can slip through the crack. Never interact with emails or other messages you receive seemingly coming from a large exchange asking you to login because of a problem or them asking for your private key, exchanges will never do that!
3. Fake ICO's/Airdrop scam:
An Initial Coin Offering is a type of crowdfunding to get a new crypto project released with a claim that in the future the early investors get their tokens. One report found that 78% of ICOs in 2017 were scams. With DeFi booming crypto Twitter and other social media have turned into a cesspool for scammers trying to lure people to their fake new DeFi projects. These scammers use social media to their advantage, promising people free coins (Airdrop) in exchange of them spreading the word around.
How to prevent getting scammed:

• Do thorough research into the newly released coin; How does the whitepaper look like? Is there an active team? What's the point of this new coin?
• If the coin asks you to 'spread the word' in exchange for free coins, it's likely to be a scam.
• Does the coin only have a Telegram or some other socials and is the team anonymous? Avoid at all costs!
• Check sites like "ICOdrops", they usually provide a lot of information about new coins.
• Research research research, don't trust it? don't buy it!

4. Impersonation giveaways:
This might be one of the easiest scams to point out, scammers pretending to be celebrities to lure you to their fake exchange or 'double' your coins. They use an army of bots to make it legit so be careful when you see anything like this on social media.
5. Pump and Dumps:
in the unregulated world of cryptocurrencies market manipulation is quite common. There are social media groups with thousands of people pumping a seemingly dead coin (low liquidity is easier to pump) to quickly after crash it again. Never join one of these groups, you will very likely lose a lot of money! The creators of the group make the calls so they can dump their bags on you. Keep an eye out of a coin that suddenly gets hyped a lot with a lot of trading volume, it might be involved in a PnD.
6. Ponzi and Pyramid schemes:
We all remember Bitconnect and its downfall, the largest crypto ponzi we had till date. Ponzi's move money from new investors to older investors, they lure in new investors with the promise of a high return. Usually people encourage each other to put money into it, but that can only go on for so long. Once there's no new people buying into the ponzi or the creator is done with it the house of cards collapses.
How to prevent getting scammed:

• Never buy a coin that promises (guaranteed 10x this year) or brags about the returns they have ''Up 11,500% in 129 days, yes I'm looking at you HEX''.
• Check the coin for functionality, does it even do something or is it just giving out money to its investors?
• Research research research, don't trust it? don't buy it!

7. Malware:
Once malware has infected your personal device its fairly easy for criminals to watch everything you type in, all your personal information (keylogger). Another type of malware is very rampant now, the clipboard replacer. When you want to send crypto, this malware replaces your address (which you copy pasted) with the address of the scammer.
How to prevent getting scammed:

• Use antivirus software on your personal device, they're fairly good at detecting dangerous programs
• Never download stuff from a sketchy source, always use the official way.
• Double check before you send crypto, is it really your address?
• Use a hardware wallet: ''One of the main benefits of a hardware wallet (I suggest either Ledger or Trezor) is that they can operate on a computer with malware but will still keep your private key secure because it's on a separate device that the OS has no access to. And you need to press a physical button to send out funds and can review the receiver address directly on the hardwarewallet to make sure it wasn't replaced by some malware'' - btc_clueless (thank you for the comment!)

I tried my best to cover all the cryptoscams out there, if I missed anything or you feel like it needs more information leave a comment!

Note: I’m not a citizen, but I’ve been living in the US long enough to be considered a resident alien for tax purposes. On my visa, I cannot work any job that’s not directly related to my major in grad school (IT/computer science), but I can invest in the stock market.

Section One: Assets and Debt

Net Worth: from -$13,603.63 (Jan 2020) to $9,605.97 (Jan 2021)
Retirement Balance: $16,000 in my 401(K).
I only started working 2 years ago and my company messed up my registration so they basically didn’t put any money into it my first year there (I found out in horror and they gave me around $1,000 to say sorry…). I contribute 9% and my company matches 3%.
Savings account balance: $2,500
I have $2,500 set aside as my “emergency fund”, and I’m building back my vacation & study abroad budgets after having to tap into them for a move. My job is very stable and I won't be let go any time soon (unless I quit myself) so I’m not setting aside a big emergency fund for now.
Checking account balance: $3,111.01
Investment account: $1,500 in some stocks.
I initially dumped half of my 2019 bonus and some monthly contributions (totaling around $4,000) to this account to test strategies. This was my “study fund” and I didn’t care if I’d lose it all. I grew the account to around $10,000 and withdrew almost everything (that went to all the fees I had to pay to break my lease, my brother’s lease, deposit, moving expenses, and new furniture) and left $1,500 worth of stocks in there right now.
Credit card debt: $2,243.76 on my BestBuy card and PayPal Credit.
I had the money to pay for the items in full but they offered X months interest-free and I wanted to throw money into my debts instead. I always pay off all balances well before the deadline. I also pay all my credit cards in full and have never paid any interest.
Student loan debt: $11,046.09 left on my $20,000 loans at 8% for my BA in Biology and Statistics. Day 1 of arriving in the US, they sat us down, handed each of us a pen, and said hey kids here are the terms of your 8% loans, sign the documents now! I just turned 17, didn't even know I had to pay this money back, and remembered thinking "Is 8% a lot?" That's how clueless I was.
As a non-citizen, I will never have them canceled, so my plan was to tackle this as soon as possible and I started paying more aggressively until they made it 0% interest since Q4 last year.
Car loan: $4,900 left on my $10,000 loan at 8.9%. I didn’t have a long credit history when I bought the car (September 2019) since I only got my first credit card after graduation, so the rate was terrible. I’m planning to pay this all off after my bonus comes in March.

Section Two: Income

Income Progression:
2012 - 2016: I had multiple student on-campus jobs all throughout my undergrad, making from $7.25 to $10/hour. After graduation, I couldn't find any job directly related to my majors within 3 months (I had only been searching for Bio lab work), ran out of money, and had to go back home. Honestly, I didn't want to keep doing science either and was very lost back then.
2017: My first full-time job was being a tutor for a private college prep institution when I went back to my home country to “figure out what I wanted to do with my life.” They paid pretty well for the standards of living there ($1,000/mo). I worked that job while self-studying how to code and data science courses on the side and preparing my grad school applications.
2019: I got a job at my current company a semester before I graduated from my MS in Data Science program. This was my first “big girl job.” I started out at $64,000 and couldn’t work for 2 months due to complications in my visa processes so that ate up all my savings that year. By the end of the year, they bumped my salary up to $76,000 and we also had an annual 3% raise, so in total $78,280 + 5% bonus.
2020: One of my teammates left and one thing led to another, I got a title change from Data Analyst to Data Scientist towards the end of the year. I asked for a raise and they bumped it to $96,000 + 5% bonus.
2021: After our annual 3% raise my salary is now $98,880 (+ at least 5% bonus). I think I’m slightly underpaid, but this job is very low-stress and flexible (especially after we WFH).
Main Job Monthly Take Home: $5,082.58
Taken from my last paychecks (before the annual raise)
Gross salary: $8,000
Tax: $2,081.68
401(k) deduction: $720
Health insurance: $115.74

Section Three: Expenses

Rent & renter’s insurance: $935 for my share for a 2bed/3bath condo. My parents pay a flat $700/mo for my brother’s share. He recently moved here since his school went virtual until at least the end of this semester and our family wanted us to be nearby to take care of each other.
Savings contribution: $900
Investment contribution: $420, but will increase once my car loan is paid off.
Debt payments:

• $1,000 on car loan until paid off.
• $200.13 minimum on student loans for now at 0% interest, will increase to $1,100 when car loan is paid off.
• $300 for Best Buy & PayPal Credit promotional deals

Car insurance: $127.01 ($762.05 paid in full every 6 months)
Car registration: $25 ($300 annual)
Donations: $20 monthly (ASPCA), plus several hundreds throughout the year (last year I donated to BLM orgs and local animal shelters)
Gas: $0. I drive an electric car. Charging probably drives up my electric bill by a bit, but still cheaper than gas. Also, this means no car maintenance at all until my car battery dies, which probably won’t happen in the next 5 years.
Utilities (electric, natural gas): ~$150
Wifi: $40
Cellphone: $10.61 ($108.66 for 6 months and I got a $45 credit from my bank)
Groceries: $500 (for 2 people)
Subscriptions: $20 (HP Ink, shared Netflix account, YNAB, Disney+)
Pet expenses: ~$20 for wet cat food
Personal care/hobby: I collect perfumes. Between makeup, skincare, clothes (which I had planned to stop buying this year) and perfume bottles and samples (the majority of my "personal care" expenses...), I averaged $400/mo last year. Without the makeup, skincare and clothes, I budget $150/mo this year for my fragrance hobby.
Household supplies: $30
Education: $30 (language/technical textbooks, Udemy/Coursera)
Gifts: $30
Credit card fee: $21 ($250 annual)

Section Four: Background

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Education is one of the top priorities in our household and this has been instilled in my mind since I was a kid. Perhaps because my grandparents were both professors and my parents both attended grad school, it was expected of us to have at least a bachelor's degree. With that said, my family tried to support our higher education financially as best they could and I'm very thankful for it. During undergrad, I had need-based financial aid and on-campus jobs, and my parents helped with the rest of my tuition. I still had to take (required by the school) a $20,000 loan. My grandmother helped pay for my 2-year master's program.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
During high school, I had a measly weekly allowance and my dad had me write out all the transactions in a notebook. I thought it was very silly back then but now thinking back, it was probably some good practice. Other than that, they didn't talk about money at all, and I was absolutely clueless and wasn't interested in personal finance until a couple of years ago. I don't remember how but I think I woke up one day and decided to read every book about personal finance I could find and now I do talk with my dad about finances.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
My first job was washing dishes as a student worker! We all had to do it our freshman year before we were allowed to find other jobs. I managed to find 3 other jobs (stage crew, sports event worker, and math tutor) and stayed with all of them for 3 years.
Did you worry about money growing up?
Even though our parents never let on to us about their finances, they made sure that we'd grow up comfortable financially, so I didn't worry because I didn't know anything.
Do you worry about money now?
Yes. As I grew up, I came to learn more about my parents' financial situation and realized that they've sacrificed a lot for us. I had the majority of my college tuition supported by the school, but my brother doesn't, and tuition in the US isn't cheap, especially when you convert it to our local currency. I also never know for how long I can stay in the US and keep making the same kind of money I'm making now so I'm trying my best to pay down the student loans ASAP.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I became fully financially responsible for myself when I started working at my current company. Before that my student worker jobs paid for my personal expenses in college but my parents still chipped in for tuition. I guess my family back home is my safety net but personally, I wouldn't ask them for help even if bad things happen to me in the future.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
Nope.

Diary

Day 1 (Thursday) - $3.35

• Alexa wakes me up and turns the light on. I change into my work clothes and head downstairs to my “office.” My boss starts our daily standup call, talking about what we did yesterday and what we plan for the day.
• I have my annual review meeting. Everything goes well and my bosses are very pleased with what I’ve done, especially after I transitioned into my new title as a Data Scientist, which honestly brought me more fulfillment in my job as well. We talk about our annual bonus and raise, which I already expected. It’s not a lot of money but hey any money is money and I’m not saying no.
• Some people bought my photocards so I gather all the orders and purchase a shipping label since 1 order is with tracked shipping. (Don’t ask me how this works but I’m a K-pop fan and we collect expensive cardboards. Depending on the popularity of the member of the group, profit margins can go up to 400%.) I head to the post office and drop off all the packages ($3.35)
• I’ve been waiting for the mailman all day and he finally comes! I’ve been working from home for almost a year now and my back pain is starting to kill me so I decided to “invest” in a $400 chair with lumbar and neck support. My cat happily takes the other chair and starts claiming her territory on it.

Day 2 (Friday) - $206.24

• I wake up on cue at Alexa’s daily briefing. Half an hour passes while I ponder on a perfume sample set I saw in someone’s fragrance collection on Reddit.
• I eventually give in and purchase the Zoologist sample set ($120.24). It’s within my budget this month, I’ve been eyeing this one for some time now and I can resell it for 80% value once I’m done testing them, so it’s not a huge loss anyway.
• Late lunch today. I make a quick lunch with sausages and keto toasts and quickly finish it while watching some YouTube videos on personal finance and updates on $GME (no I did not buy any shares).
• When in doubt, throw every leftover food in your fridge in a pan and make fried rice. Side dish is sweet and sour tomato and egg “cloud soup.” Then we have our weekly family video call with my parents back in my home country.
• I go down the YouTube rabbit hole again and buy 2 more perfume sample sets ($86.00). All the purchases today (~50 samples) would probably take me months to try out so I promise myself no more until next quarter as I click the pay button.

Day 3 (Saturday) - $71.27

• I wake up at 8:45 am and laze around for half an hour, scrolling down Twitter and answering my friend’s questions on how to enter the stock market. Today is my cheat day (I have one every 2-3 weeks), so I contemplate if I should order delivery for lunch. I check YNAB and decide that it’s too expensive, so I go downstairs to make myself a hearty breakfast with a latte, half a croissant, grilled chicken breasts, and snack on some shrimp crackers and tangerines.
• I purchase a shipping label ($3.22) and head out to the post office. For some reason I want to smell like a lemon cake today, so I spritz on Xerjoff Lira, put on sunscreen, and head out. This perfume always makes me feel so warm and delicious.
• I spend the whole afternoon catching up with my Chinese and Korean lessons for the week.
• Suddenly craving some instant noodles, so I immediately get up and head to a local Asian grocery store to shop for instant and pho noodles (I’m planning to make pho for Lunar New Year) and some snacks for my brother ($38.71). We drop by a bubble tea shop nearby and get bubble tea and 2 dessert cakes ($19.71). I usually don’t drink sugary drinks, but since it’s my cheat day, I put in an order and pay for the both of us.
• Some more PC orders came in and they’re all with tracked shipping. The post office is closed tomorrow but I’ll just pay now for the shipping labels so that I won’t forget ($9.63).

Day 4 (Sunday) - $0.00

• I literally do nothing today until 4 pm.
• I make dinner, then finish my Chinese lesson and review the flashcards I made yesterday. That’s enough activity for the day.
• One of my friends calls to show me her album haul of the day and I'm tempted, but (fortunately?) there's no kpop store in my city so I make myself forget about buying any more albums.

Day 5 (Monday) - $40.10

• I wake up with a headache, not feeling too well, so I request a day off and message my boss. I can’t go back to sleep, so I just lie there in bed for a couple of hours. I suddenly remember that WandaVision is on air, and there are a couple of movies on there I haven’t watched yet, so I subscribe to Disney+ ($7.52) and start binge-watching.
• We ran out of soft drinks for my brother, so I have to drive to Costco again after lunch ($32.58). I also need to drop off all the orders that came in over the weekend.
• I go to my old apartment for my move-out inspection (I haven't been living there since December but still had to honor the 2-month notice and pay for all the rent). There are a couple of spots that might cost me some deductions in my deposit. Sigh. At least I get to tell them to remove the charges on my lease for February, and they assure me that they will.
• I finish binge-watching some movies on Disney+. I see Colourpop is advertising some Valentine’s Day palettes on my feed. I do not need those, I do not need those, I do not need those. I should’ve just unfollowed makeup brands on social media. Some more late-night scrolling, and then I finally go to sleep.

Day 6 (Tuesday) - $8.02

• I wake up groggily, still feeling a bit sick. We have a late standup today, so I take my time making my coffee and start working, as my cat also settles in on my lap and starts napping. My head is still aching and I'm not sure if it's the cold or just keto flu so I load up on electrolytes, fish oil, and acetaminophen just in case.
• Somebody lowballed me on one of my postings. Ugh I hate it when they do this, but this one is not selling too well, so I meet them halfway. I purchase another shipping label ($3.03).
• Today is our bi-monthly deployment date, which means all the engineers (and anyone who has committed changes in our codebase) meet up and sit around until all the merges are deployed into production. I had some changes last week so I just sit there and do my own work until it's my turn. My boss told me this morning he had some test API from one of our new clients so I go to check out some of the data there. Oh how I love me some messy, messy data that nobody knows what to do with.
• The repair guy who came to fix our washing machine doesn't leave until 5:15 pm so I drop by the post office late, but just in time as they're collecting the mail! Then I drop by a nearby (rather upscale) grocery store as I'm running out of heavy cream, but everything is so expensive. I compare price per oz and pick up the coffee creamer instead ($4.99).
• I heat up the cauliflower rice and leftover curry and eat dinner as I watch Coco (I can't believe I've never actually watched it!) Then I review my Chinese flashcards for a bit, do half an hour of Just Dance until I sweat, play with my cat, and call it a day.

Day 7 (Wednesday) - $3.49

• I stayed up quite late yesterday playing a mobile game and finally wake up after snoozing the alarm for the 84th time. My boss starts our standup at our usual time; there's nothing urgent or pressing today so I just take my time. I take a quick nap in the afternoon and go back to work.
• I use the last drops of avocado oil to fry up some bulgogi for dinner. Need to go back to Costco for more avocado oil tomorrow, I guess.
• After dinner, a friend asks me about perfume samples that she wants to try. I go online to search for them but no dice since they belong to a new collection that only got launched in Europe. I take this time to try out some similar smelling samples in my collection as well.
• I review my Chinese flashcards and do some workbook exercises. After an hour, my brain is fried on Chinese but I don't want to go to bed yet, so I pick up a book on my bookcase that I was reading a while ago (A Random Walk Down Wall Street) and read one more chapter.
• An order came in so I purchase another shipping label ($3.49), update my budgeting app for a bit, and then head to bed.

Summary

​

Category	Amount	Note
Food & Drink	$95.99	Groceries
Fun / Entertainment	$7.52	Disney+ subscription
Home & Health	$0.00
Clothes & Beauty	$206.24	Perfume samples
Other*	$22.72	Shipping labels
Total	$309.75	shipping labels not included

*I don’t count the shipping labels as expenses because they’re already factored into the profits I made from my sales, but I included them anyway because they're still charges on my accounts. Any profit goes back to funding my album purchases so... I guess it's a vicious cycle.
Overall, a pretty normal week for me in terms of food. I don’t eat out often (I allow myself only one meal and one dessert every month) and have used up my 1 dessert allowance this week so I probably won't have any more this month. I might’ve gone overboard with the perfume purchases this week, but tbh perfumes bring me joy. My mood is lifted and I'm transported to old and new places every time I put on a perfume that I enjoy, so for me, it’s worth it. I try to be frugal whenever I can, but I'll never skimp on education and hobbies that make me happy. Writing this week-long diary, I realize I need to get back to working out, though. I'll probably have to stop procrastinating and pull out my RingFit gears still inside the moving boxes. Playing Just Dance also makes me miss dancing so bad as I used to be active in several dance crews since college (but stopped after I started working full time). I'll try to stick to Just Dance for now to get my cardio until Covid is over and I can get back to in-person dance classes.

Note: This post is about 2 audition tapes for the character "Sikorsky", 1 about the character "Jennifer Moores", who is directly connected to the Sikorsky one, and a bonus audition tape about Cooper being offered a position as a US Senator. The audition tapes show us different scenes, and give us A LOT of information to discuss, and I mean A LOT of information. I will also leave a link and transcripts for an audition tape for the character "Ogden Greely", who's going to be the blacklister in 8.08. Let's get started. Note: I will leave the links for each of these audition tapes in the end of this post if anyone would like to check them out for themselves.

Sikorsky Scene #1:

Sikorsky - Speaks foreign language - Translated by u/Hazardous1230 - "Did you do everything correctly?"
Unknown - "I did my part."
Sikorsky - Speaks foreign language
Unknown - "I shouldn't have to say this after 30 years, I don't work for you." (apparently it's don't but some people think it's not)
Sikorsky - Speaks foreign language.
Unknown - "An allegation no-one believes."
Sikorsky - Speaks foreign language
Unknown - "I flew 15 hours so I could look you in the eye and tell you what I told Rakitin (for more information about Rakitin, continue reading this post and check out this post too: https://www.reddit.com/TheBlackList/comments/l5duez/an_addon_to_my_previous_post_check_my_comment/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share ), Elizabeth Keen is off-limits."
Sikorsky - "And I asked you to fly here so I could look you in the eye and tell you: I agree... for now."
In this scene, we can see that someone flew all the way to Eastern Europe to meet with Sikorsky and tell him that Elizabeth Keen is off-limits. This sounds a lot like Reddington, but it could also be Ilya. Apparently they talk about an allegation (my guess is that the allegation is that Reddington killed Heidegger, or he's N13). We also hear about this Rakitin character, whoever they are.
PLEASE, IF YOU UNDERSTAND THE FOREIGN LANGUAGE USED IN THIS AUDITION TAPE, PLEASE COMMENT AND TELL US, IT'S EXTREMELY IMPORTANT! Link to the auditions' tapes is at the end of this post. I'll update this post as soon as someone does that, and I'll give full credit.
After spending a few hours searching for Russian users who could translate it for me, 90% of them didn't even think it was Russian. That's how bad this guy's Russian pronunciation is. This is the best I could get: ("////" means that the word(s) supposed to be there can't be recognized)
0:06 our friends ////// NAME is satisfied
0:16 we know about NAME that she says you ////
0:30 ///// nobody is sure ////do everything possible to keep it that way

Sikorsky Scene #2:

Sikorsky - "Thank you for coming, we have much to discuss. I'm told Rakitin is in play."
Unknown - "My safe deposit box was compromised."
Sikorsky - "And the flashdrive I entrusted you with?"
Unknown - "I'm still looking for it."
Sikorsky - "Not that we have to thank Elizabeth Keen for it going missing."
Unknown - "My position on her hasn't changed."
Sikorsky - "I understand. She is... uhh... untouchable. But you must understand, Harold Cooper is not. If he gains access to the Rakitin files, you will have to eliminate him."
Unknown - "I understand."
Ok so in this scene we can see that Sikorsky is having a meeting with someone. I believe this is the same someone we have seen before, because it just sounds like the same person. There's also this line "My position on her hasn't changed". The Unknown says that his/her safe deposit box was breached, and since there's a high chance that this safe deposit box might be Reddington's, I think there's a chance that this Unknown might be Reddington. I don't think Ilya would be "looking for it". We can also see that Liz is responsible for it going missing, so she's probably the one who hired Fribourg Confidence (check the next scenes) to rob the safe deposit box. Finally, they talk about Harold and how he's involved. Perhaps the taskforce is looking for it too, or Liz's endgame is to send it to Harold. Either way, Cooper is in real danger and I'm not sure if Reddington would go so far and kill him to keep the flash drive secret. We know from another audition tape for 8.08 that Cooper will be offered a position as a Senator so maybe that's Reddington's way of getting Cooper out of the way. We will see. I'll add that audition tape to this post as a courtesy.

Jennifer Moores Scene #1:

Jennifer - "I'm gonna make this easy, Carl. Trip the alarm, your wife dies. Look at our faces, your wife dies."
Carl - "Where are we going?"
Unknown - "Wherever you keep the guard (?) key for box 49."
Unknown - (didn't understand)
Jennifer - "Cameras."
Carl - "Do you know who that belongs to?"
Jennifer - "(small laugh) Once we leave, you wait. Once your wife calls, hmm, you're free to go."
Ok so in this scene we can see Jennifer, as well as the rest of her crew (keep in mind that in this episode, 8.05, the blacklisters are bank robbers who steal things from other criminals) stealing something from what makes total sense is one of Reddington's deposit boxes, number 49. Could this be the same deposit box where Dembe was back in 7.02, when he was going to "enact the protocol"? We also found out the name of the victims. Carl Conway and his wife, Colleen Conway (we know this because if you check the IMDB cast for this episode, you'll understand. Link: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt13586364/

Jennifer Moores Scene #2:

Jennifer - "What's this about? We are not supposed to meet until I'm at the hand off to the client."
Unknown - "We have a problem. Reddington showed up at your dad's apartment yesterday."
Jennifer - "Raymond Reddington?!"
Unknown - "This was a mistake."
Jennifer - "You sure it was him? What exactly did Reddington say?"
Unknown - "He was asking your dad about you. About the job. He will kill us if he finds us."
Jennifer - "Raff, what do you wanna do? Call Reddington, say you're sorry, and give it back? What's done, is done."
Unknown - "We need to split up. Lay low."
Jennifer - "Yes, but not until after we deliver the drive to Gibbons and get paid. (calls someone on the phone) Carolyn, it's me. I need to move up the meet. Peer Smill, in Rock Creek Park."
Ok so this scene at first sight doesn't really have much info. The most important thing we got from this one apparently is that they stole the flash drive from Reddington. But there's also this: (thank you u/NoSidesOnlyPlayers)
Carolyn Givens was the cover Red used for Liz in Wujing.
Liz: What? What cover?
Red: Carolyn Givins, PhD in Applied Physics from M.I.T. I’ve told them you’re my new encryption specialist.
So this Carolyn is the alias Liz is using. Nice catch!

Jennifer Moore Scene #3:

Jennifer - "Leave my father out of this."
Unknown (most likely FBI) - "I'd love to, but your father was a legendary safe-cracker and thief. You'd expect us to look over that?"
Jennifer - "He went to prison when I was 7. Look, I hated the man. He walked out of my life, and abandoned me. Even if I knew where he was, I won't tell you. He's an old man."
Unknown (definitely FBI) - "He said, I figured I had something to teach her. To share with her. A reason to be in her life."
Jennifer - "(laughs) Is that what he told you? Well, he's lying."
Ok, we got absolutely nothing from this scene, only that Jennifer Moores will be caught by the FBI.
Now moving on to the audition tape in which Cooper is offered a position as a US Senator. This audition tape is for the characters "Ogden Greely" (the blacklister of 8.08) and "Alan Tuppert", a high ranking government official (you can see him in the cast for 8.08 (link: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt13848578/)).

Ogden Greely Scene #1:

Ogden - "I'm a patriot. I've tried and failed to convince those charged with keeping America safe to act responsibly. As a result, I have come to believe that the only way to address our security issues, is to exploit them. To help this country by hurting it. To show the bureaucrats through military defeat that the flaws that they're too blind to see on paper. Accordingly, I've decided to sell my knowledge of the vulnerabilities present in our satellites system to the highest bidder. As you're about to see, these vulnerabilities are potentially catastrophic."
Ok so this sounds like a very good start scene to introduce us this blacklister. Not gonna lie, it sounds good.

Ogden Greely Scene #2:

Reddington - "Mr. Greely! Ogden, may I call you Ogden?"
Ogden - "I have to say, Mr. Reddington, I never imagined you could raise this kind of capital."
Reddington - "I'm rather surprised myself. Apparently, I have a phenomenal high criminal credit score."
Ogden - "(small laugh)"
Reddington - "Let's not talk here. Why don't we move inside?"
Ok so apparently Reddington bought information about the vulnerabilities of the US satellites system for some reason.

Alan Tuppert Scene #1:

Cooper - "I have to say, I was surprised by your call. I've never met Governor (something), I didn't realize he knew anything about me."
Alan - "He knows more than you might think."
Cooper - "Is that so? What exactly does the Governor think he knows?"
Alan - "Only a handful of people know what I'm about to tell you, so whatever happens here, we're assuming your discretion. After 41 years of public service, Senator Warwick has decided to retire."
Cooper - "When?"
Alan - "He's preparing an announcement."
Cooper - "I'm sorry to hear that, but I'm still not sure how that connects to the Governor's legislative director asking me to breakfast."
Alan - "Once Senator Warwick steps down, the Governor will have the authority to appoint his replacement. Your name came up."
Cooper - "Me?"
Alan - "You've had a distinguished military career, followed by a long and for what I hear exemplary run at the Bureau."
Cooper - "I have no experience in politics."
Alan - "(small laugh) You say that like it's a bad thing."
Cooper - "You're serious? The Governor's actually considering this..."
Alan - "He's a good man, Harold. He's looking for the right person. Whatever good you're doing at the Bureau, think how much more you could accomplish in the Senate. Real change, on a national level. You've earnt this opportunity. You did your time in the trenches, let somebody else hold the line. The people of Virginia need you."
Cooper - "What do you need?"
Alan - "Permission, to consider you for the position. Right now, you're top of our list, but I need to know that you'll say yes if we go in your direction.

Alan Tuppert Scene #2:

Alan - "Director, or should I say Senator?"
Unknown - "Would you give us a moment?"
Alan - "Good news loves company."
Unknown - "Then you should definitely go."
Ok, so from these 2 scenes, we can tell that Cooper will be offered a position as a Senator (in Virginia, I think, I don't know how American politics work) but he will have to step down from his position as Director. Could this be related to the fact that Sikorsky expects Reddington to kill Cooper if he finds out about the flashdrive?
I've made a similar post about an audition tape for the character "Skip Hadley" (the second lawyer seen with Reddington and Marvin) who will have an important role as Liz's inside man in Reddington's team. Yes, that's right. We also know that Reddington will very likely kill Marvin and replace him with Skip, who he doesn't know is working for Liz. If you'd like to know more, check out my post: https://www.reddit.com/TheBlackList/comments/l3oxof/season_8_episode_4_exclusive_audition_tape/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
Links to the auditions' tapes:
Sikorsky #1: https://vimeo.com/470734703
Sikorsky #2: https://vimeo.com/470729282
Jennifer Moores: https://vimeo.com/478340765
Ogden Greely/Alan Tuppert: https://vimeo.com/492201598

0️⃣Section Zero: Background
Hello, MD! I hope you're all doing well, and are safe and healthy. I've gone back and forth for a while about whether I should share my money diary. I signed up to do one last year to chronicle our home buying process but chickened out (I'm so sorry mods!). I was worried I'd be judged for what I spent money on, not having a college education, or what might be perceived as frivolous habits. I don't know. Internet strangers terrify me. But I'm finally sharing this money diary because I want this to be a data point: you can have a career (or two!) without a college degree.
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I moved to the US right before entering elementary school. I spent half my childhood in a simple four room shack with no running water or electricity (mom's side of the family) and the other half in a large house with a nanny and domestic help (dad's side of the family). From a young age I was told that college was chance at a better life and I believed it -- not going to college wasn't an option. My mom completed a healthcare related degree in our home country but she couldn't practice in the US. My dad dropped out of college in our home country due to his work as a student protester. Both of them worked blue-collar jobs to support our family and were always working. As with just about every parent, they wanted more for me.
I was accepted to a top ranked private university but didn't get a sizable scholarship so my parents and I took out loans, separately, to fund my tuition. I dropped out halfway through my sophomore year due to poor mental health stemming from an assault. No one knows (except for my fiancé and now, internet strangers) the real reason why I left school.
Did you worry about money growing up?
Yes. My parents never talked about their money struggles with me, but I knew money was always tight. After my youngest brother was born, I remember how excited I was to find a jar of peanut butter in our cupboard. We hadn't had any for a while. It had a "WIC" sticker on it and I didn't know what it meant at the time. My parents never talked about receiving government support but I'm thankful that we had a safety net available to us when we needed it most.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I started paying my parents rent to stay in my childhood bedroom when I moved back home. I didn't pay for groceries or to use one of their cars, which was nice. I was about 21 when I was completely on my own. My parents and I had a falling out over me dating a much older man who I'd come to learn was very abusive. There were a few months where I slept on a friend's couch because I barely had money to feed myself. My early 20's were rough. But if I were to go completely broke now, my parents would be there to help me. They're doing much better financially.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
No. I've never received an inheritance or any other passive income.
Finally, a note on Erik: he also doesn't come from money or finish his college degree. He immigrated to the US less than a decade ago and does not receive or provide monetary support to his mom or dad.
1️⃣Section One: Assets and Debt

Combined net worth:	$3.7M
Combined brokerage balance:	$2.14M	$317,587 (mine) + $1.82M (Erik)
Combined retirement balance:	$195k	$116,300 (mine) + $78,700Erik). We're behind on funding our 401ks. I finally convinced Erik to take advantage of his employer match program two years ago. He was concerned about the ease of withdrawing funds since we plan on living outside of the US when we retire.
Joint checking account balance:	$111k	We have a lot of cash on hand right now because we need to prepay income taxes, and will be furnishing our place.
Equity:	$1.42M	We put 40% down on a 2 bedroom/2.5 bath condo (<1,200 ft2) in a new construction last summer. Our down payment came from the sale of some of Erik's RSUs.
Mortgage:	$1.61M	For our financial situation, an interest-only mortgage made sense. We have a 2.35% APR 7/1 ARM since we don't intend to stay in NYC longterm. Our plan is to pay off the remaining mortgage in full after five years and either sell the condo or hold onto it as rental property.
Combined credit card debt:	$0	We pay off our credit cards in full every month. We put between $6k - 20k on our cards every month in a typical year. He's also the authorized user on my credit cards; I added him to my accounts about six years ago to help him build his credit file since we knew we'd eventually buy a place together.
Combined student loan debt:	$0	I finished paying my student loans two years ago. Erik received free tuition as an EU resident but had some cost-of-living loans which he's paid off.

2️⃣Section Two: Income My fiancé and I ended 2020 with a total cash compensation (base + bonus) of $493,750 but with last year's vested RSUs, our overall compensation is:

	Mine	Erik
Base	$131,250	$268,750
Bonus	~$13,125	~$80,625
Vested RSUs	$121,500	$835,500
Total Compensation	$265,875	$1.18M

Income Progression I don't recall my salary increases so I'm listing my starting base salary for each role. I'm also not including additional compensation such as bonus or RSUs.

• HS and into my early 20's: minimum wage. I started working when I was 16 as a hostess for a restaurant and worked there throughout high school. In the summer before and after freshman year of university, I worked at a department store on commission. After I left university, I worked there full time and also picked up two part-time jobs (restaurant hostess, receptionist) to make ends meet.
• Job 1: $30,000 as a business development manager for a staffing agency in a HCOL (rent was $600 for a room in a 2bd/1ba). I worked there for three months.
• Job 2: $50,000 as a recruiting assistant then promoted to recruiter for a large non-profit in a HCOL (rent was $1200 for a room in a 3 bd/2ba). I was there for three years.
• Job 3: $75,000 as a recruiter for a large research institution in a VHCOL (rent was $1600 for a 1bd/1ba shared with ex-bf). I was there for three years. Looking back now, I didn't realize how burned out I was at the end. I fully believed in our mission to save lives and was so grateful to have that job. I was working directly with these world class physicians and scientists, and I had no college degree. I felt like I had to prove I belonged there. To me that meant staying in my office until 2-3am some nights (mornings?). When an opportunity to change industries, I took it.
• Job 4: $90,000 as a recruiter for a tech company in a VHCOL (rent was $1400 for a room in a 3bd/2ba). I was in that role for 2.5 years. When I joined the company, there were less than 5,000 employees. It was an amazing experience to have a hand in building teams of incredibly bright and kind people, many of whom now are now leading global teams of their own. But, I was traveling non-stop. It was exhausting and I experienced burnout (again). I had turned in my notice to HR and started letting people know. It was in one of those "goodbye" conversations that a director I closely worked with asked me if I'd be interested in joining her group as a PM. That opportunity changed the trajectory of my career. I stayed and switched roles.
• Job 5: $110,000 as a program manager for the same tech company in a VHCOL (rent was $4400 for a 2bd/2ba with Erik). I was in that role for 2.5 years. I worked on public-facing initiatives, built some awesome programs, and partnered with senior leadership daily. By this time, the company had grown 10x and had no signs of slowing down. But I needed to slow down. I didn't really take time to decompress after my two previous roles. Erik saw how unhappy I'd become. He supported me leaving the workforce for a year and I'm grateful I had his support, the opportunity, and the ability to do it.
• Took a year off. –$20,000 withdrawn from my brokerage accounts in a VHCOL (rent was $4000 for a 1bd/1ba with Erik). I didn't do anything remotely awesome during this time. I was coming out of a pretty bad depression so I took it easy on myself. I watched a lot of Investigation Discovery, cooked, napped, went down many Wikipedia rabbit holes, and joined Erik on all his business trips.
• Current Job: $125,000 as a program manager at a tech company in a VHCOL (mortgage + common charges is ~$4400 for a 2bd/2.5ba with Erik). I've been in this role for almost two years.

Main Job Monthly Take Home

Deductions	Mine	Erik
Retirement	15% of paycheck to Roth 401k	7% of paycheck to 401k
M/D/V	under Erik's employer; my employer also provides free M/D/V but we would have different providers	covered by his employer + $~250 for mine
Life insurance and AD&D	covered by my employer	covered by his employer
Short & long term disability	covered by my employer	covered by his employer
Net monthly take home	$7,000	$10,00

3️⃣Section Three: Expenses This is what our YNAB budget roughly looks like (for annual expenses, I set aside an amount per month towards the expense):
Housing

• Mortgage: $3,155
• Common charges: $1,260
• Property tax: $27,509 annual
• Homeowner's insurance: $837 annual
• Utilities: $300
• Staff bonus: $1,200 annual (1 super, 5 FT front desk, 2 porters)

Transportation These would be significantly higher in normal times. We rarely leave our place and if we do, we walk.

• Public transportation: $20
• Rideshare/taxi: $30

Entertainment

• Books & Magazines: $50 (Audible, Readly, news+, NYT)
• Music & Podcasts: $25 (Pandora, Spotify, Patreon, Blinkist)
• TV & Streaming: $120 (Hulu, Netflix, Masterclass)

Donations: $10,000 annual We donate to Children International on a monthly basis. The remaining amount is donated throughout the year to different causes. Last year, we supported AIDS research, mental health and addiction support, food banks, and international food programs.
Hobbies:

• Fitness: $176 (Aaptiv, Future, Whoop)
• Flowers: $125
• Photography: $10 (Photoshop)

Fields

• Pet insurance: $1,500 annual
• Veterinary care: $1,500 annual
• Pet food & medication: $500

Savings & Finance

• Backdoor IRA: $6,000 annual
• Acorns: $250
• Betterment: $500
• Credit card annual fees: $1,890 annual

Food & Drink Pre-COVID, we'd budget $3,000 to a "Restaurant", increase "Cafes & Bars" to $1,500, and decrease "Delivery & Takeout" to $1,000.

• Delivery & Takeout: $3,000
• Cafes & Bars: $700
• Groceries: $300

Wedding: TBD Our original budget was $75,000 (international, <50 people). We've had to reschedule it twice now and have already spent $10k in lost deposits and rescheduling fees. We'll re-evaluate our budget later this year when we start planning again.
4️⃣Section 4: The Diary

Day 1: Monday | Total: $111.84 

8:00am - First day back from holiday break for both Erik and me. He's still snoozing so I turn on the bedroom TV to see if our dog is still sleeping too. We adopted a senior dog, Fields, over the summer and quickly became one of those dog owners that installed cameras everywhere so we can watch him anytime, anywhere. Fields is still asleep so I check my work accounts and respond to anything urgent.
8:30am - Normally, this is when I'd take Fields for his morning walk while Erik makes our coffee. But our espresso machine is broken so we can't use it until the replacement parts arrive next week. Erik and I both start getting dressed to take Fields for a walk together. Before that happens, I take the dog outside to relieve himself and we quickly head back to the apartment for his breakfast.
9:30am - We walk to our favorite coffee spot in our neighborhood and get our usual: cortado with whole milk for Erik, cold brew with a splash of oat milk for me, and a breakfast BLT to share. We walk back to our apartment and get to work. $23.69
12:30pm - I take Fields with me to pick up our lunch at Sweetgreen: a kale caesar salad (hold the tomato and swap for the blackened chicken) for me, and a hot honey chicken plate for Erik. $27.71
4:30pm - Erik and I are dire need of coffee. We take the dog for another walk, this time to our other favorite coffee shop. The decor is very IG-friendly and their coffee is fantastic. I get their matcha latte with oat milk, Erik gets a cortado with whole milk, we split an avocado toast with smoked salmon, and Fields get a whole lot of snacks for being a good boy while he waits for our order to be ready. $29.95
4:45pm - We walk past a cute mochi ice cream shop that I've been meaning to try. I pick up eight mochi ice creams: ube, chocolate hazelnut, passion fruit, mango, and some seasonal flavors. $30.48
5:00pm - We get home just in time to feed the dog. His food is laughably expensive but we think it's worth it and most importantly, Fields is worth it! He's the best dog and we want to spoil him during his final years. Especially since the poor pup was returned to the shelter twice within a year. I can't imagine giving up this sweet old guy.
9:00pm - I log off work and head down to our building's gym to workout. I've been working with a trainer through the app, Future, and like it so far. Pre-pandemic, I was in really good shape as I was training for a half marathon and our now-postponed wedding. Since the lockdowns started, my healthy eating habits and will to workout has gone down a very messy spiral. I do a mile run on the treadmill followed by a set that includes split squats and deadlifts. Ouch.
10:15pm - I walk into the apartment to find Erik's made dinner from yesterday's leftovers: tacos! I quickly eat two tacos, then tidy up the kitchen while Erik takes Fields out for his last potty break before bed.
10:45pm - I rinse off in the shower and start my nighttime routine. Erik won't see me for another 45 minutes, at least. Tonight, I use a dermaroller on my arms and legs before rubbing in vitamin C lotion. While the lotion dries, I start on my face: facewash, essence, serum, niacinamide and azaleic acid, eye serum, and all topped off with a nighttime cream cream. This is a typical nighttime routine for me.
11:30pm - Finally in bed. We put on a Netflix comedy special while I finish my routine in bed: foot cream, hand cream, and cuticle oil. Erik is browsing on the iPad looking for pots and planters. We call it a night just after midnight.

Day 2: Tuesday | Total: $199.41 

8:30am - We're both really tired. I want to lay in bed a little longer but Erik has a call at 10am and we need coffee. Since his pants are on first, I convince him to take the dog outside so I can get ready. He agrees. I put on sweats and prepare Fields' breakfast.
9:15am - We walk to a cute Australian coffee shop and order: a cortado with whole milk for Erik (it's the only thing he drinks), a cold brew with oat milk for me, and share one of my favorite breakfast sandwiches. It's got prosciutto on it and a perfectly runny egg! $23.58
12:45pm - I lost track of time and forgot to order lunch. I place an order at Chop't: avoketo chicken club salad sans tomatoes for me and a kebab cobb wrap for Erik. Once it's ready, I take Fields with me to pick it up. $25.67
1:15pm - While eating lunch, I order Ess-A-Bagels to be sent to two girlfriends across the country as very belated Christmas gifts. I meant to send them their gifts earlier but they've had family visiting them and I wanted to make sure they got to enjoy their gift. I know they both really love Ess-A-Bagels and wouldn't be too keen to share. $213.90 - $100.00 AMEX offers credit = $113.90
3:00pm - That salad was not enough. I pull a Daily Harvest mint + cacao smoothie from our freezer to make a smoothie with oat milk and split it with Erik.
4:30pm - Ok, we really need coffee. We head back to cute IG-friendly coffee shop we went to yesterday and order the same drinks but skip the sandwich. $12.74
4:45pm - On the way home, I tell Erik that I need to eat something more substantial. I was feeling hangry. We stop by our favorite mediterranean cafe. I order a kebab bowl and Erik gets the kebab sandwich. $23.52
5:15pm - We get home just in time for me to get ready for my last meeting of the day and feed Fields his dinner. Today, he gets lamb and red quinoa.
8:45pm - My trainer has a run scheduled for me today but I'm so tired; I don't think I slept well. I message my trainer to tell her I'm taking the day off but will make up the run tomorrow!
9:30pm - I catch up with some girlfriends on the west coast over text while watching an old Dateline: Secrets Uncovered episode. I remember we have mochi ice cream and eat two of them. This is a great night.
10:30pm - I need to sleep earlier tonight since I need to get a run in tomorrow morning. I have a Morpheus8 appointment at 11am and I can't workout after that.

Day 3: Wednesday | Total: $290.44 

8:00am - The alarm goes off and I yell at Siri to stop. I roll back over and snuggle Erik. The run isn't happening.
9:00am - I receive a call from the clinic where I get my Morpheus8 done. My esthetician has a family emergency and can't make the appointment. I'm secretly excited to reschedule for a later date since I have a face lipo, neck lipo and buccal fat removal procedure in exactly a week. I know, I know. Scheduling procedures so close to each other isn't the smartest idea, but I wanted to finish my Morpheus8 series before more invasive procedures. To get the kind of results I wanted, I needed three Morpheus8 sessions booked about a month apart. Today was supposed to be my last one.
9:20am - Walk Fields with Erik to get our usual coffee order and split a bagel with smoked salmon, alfalfa sprouts, picked red onions, chili and dill. $27.85
3:00pm - During our team meeting, my director asks me if I've seen the news. I grab my phone to look at the news and feel my anxiety spike as I learn that the Capital is actively being breached. I know my mental health is going to take another hit after this. Instead of working, I doom scroll the rest of the day. I also realize that salad isn't going to cut it for lunch. Not today. I need something more comforting and warm. We decide on Chinese food: ma po tofu and black pepper beef with a lot of fluffy white rice. $64.52
4:45pm - It's time for my sort-of monthly nail appointment. I go every three weeks to this amazing salon that specializes in nail art but they're also superb at taking care of your nails. I pick a sunny yellow color to offset the shit that happened this afternoon. They're pricey ($75 + $20 tip) but my nails and cuticle beds have never looked healthier. I also buy a ceramic cuticle pusher tool ($15). $114.40
7:15pm - I convince Erik to meet me at our neighborhood pizza spot to pick up dinner. We order: a pepperoni Sicilian slice, Hawaiian slice, ham and cheese calzone, and four slices of cheese, root beer and diet soda. $46.65
8:30pm - While scrolling through IG, I see a dermatologist use snail extract for her NuFace. I've been meaning to buy more NuFace gel and this seems like a good cost-effective replacement. I find the same bottle on Ulta and add an eyeshadow brush to get free shipping. I'm project panning my eyeshadow palettes so this will be a fun new tool to play with. $37.02
12:00am - Bedtime.

Day 4: Thursday | Total: $112.13 

8:00am - Same routine as the days before: get dressed, take Fields out, give him breakfast, and head out for our family walk.
9:00am - Another day, a new cafe. We order our usual coffees, and split a breakfast sandwiche: herb omelette on a toasted baguette slathered with spicy aioli and topped with bacon. $27.22
9:15am - I realize that I dropped Erik's credit card somewhere between the cafe and our apartment (I didn't bring my wallet so I asked Erik for his card at the cafe). I call the cafe and ask if they'd seen it; they hadn't. And just as I'm about to call the bank to cancel the card, the cafe calls back -- someone found it on the sidewalk and turned it in! We thank them for following up and tell them we'll pick it up tomorrow.
1:00pm - I wake Fields up from his nap so we can walk to get our usual Sweetgreens order. $27.71
7:00pm - Erik and I take Fields on a walk to pick up Thai food for dinner. We order beef pad kee mao, shrimp tom kha soup, chicken pad thai, and mango with sticky rice. $51.75
9:00pm - While reconciling this week's expenses, I see that my Sephora credit card payment was returned and I was charged not only a late fee, but a finance charge! I signed up for the Sephora card over the holidays to take advantage of their cash back program and this was my first payment to them. I go on the website to investigate what happened and find that I missed entering a "0" to my linked bank account. I call their customer service rep to explain everything. I ask her if she could waive the late payment fee ($35) and the finance charge ($5.45) if I paid the balance in full. She said she's able to waive the late payment fee but not the finance charge. I thank her for her help and hope this doesn't affect my credit score too much. $5.45
12:00am - Zzzzzzz.

Day 5: Friday | Total: $245.56 

8:00am - Same morning routine as yesterday.
9:00am - Same breakfast routine as yesterday but add additional tip since they held onto Erik's card. $28.67
12:00pm - Wake Fields up from his nap for a quick walk to Just Salad. I get a chicken caesar salad while Erik gets a chicken poblano salad. $23.70
7:10pm dinner - Friday's are our date nights. Before the pandemic, we'd get dressed up and go out for a nice meal and spend quality one-on-one time. These days, we usually order in fancy sushi and watch a movie. Between us, we order 19 pieces of sashimi and nigiri like uni (my favorite), zuke, wagyu, and tamago. $193.19
10:30pm - As soon as Erik gets back from taking Fields out, we pile onto the couch to watch Jurassic Park.
1:00am - Sleep.

Day 6: Saturday | Total: $375.24 

9:00am - It's a late start to the morning. After feeding Fields, we walk to pick up breakfast. We get our usual coffee order, a bagel with smoked salmon and a chocolate croissant. $34.12
1:20pm - I saw someone post in a cooking subreddit about seasoning that a local restaurant uses on their wings. Of course I google the restaurant and get hungry from looking at their photos. I end up ordering lunch from them: wings (of course), coconut crab curry, shrimp chips and chili jam, thai iced tea, and khua kling. It was all delicious but holy cow everything was so spicy. Definitely will order from them again though! $93.40
3:45pm - I see a notification pop up for a charge on our card. I assume it's something for Erik's current house project (building our custom closets). I ask him about it and it's actually a router extender. $125.85
8:00pm - We've been missing Mission-style burritos lately and haven't found a good replacement in New York yet. But we did find a restaurant that makes delicious Mexican food. I get two spicy pork tacos and one al pastor taco, Erik gets a spicy pork burrito and a mandarin Jarritos, and we split a large chips and guacamole. $49.87
10:00pm - While browsing Reddit), I see someone post decants for sale of fragrances I've been meaning to try. Fragrances were a serious hobby of mine for a while, to the point that I hired a fragrance "fixer" on a Paris trip to take me around the local shops. I've since scaled back my collecting and have been focusing on learning to differentiate scents better. $72.00
11:00pm - Goodnight!

Day 7: Sunday | Total: $134.57 

9:00am - Another late start to the morning. We do our morning routine with Fields and walk to get breakfast. This time, we head back to the cafe that found Erik's credit card. We get our coffees along with the herb omelette baguette with bacon. $27.56
12:00pm - There's some leftovers from yesterday's very spicy lunch so we eat that for lunch. I think the food might actually be spicier today.
6:00pm - I FaceTime with a girlfriend on the west coast who shares some amazing life news. Her and her husband are moving from the west coast! While I'm sad they're not moving to New York, I'm thrilled that they'll be closer to us and that she has an amazing new role. This is a huge win for her career and I'm really proud of her.
9:40pm - We realize we haven't had dinner. We both want something much less spicy so we order in Italian: caesar salad, pasta alla gricia, and a spicy vodka pasta. $107.07
11:00pm - We owe a response to our wedding planners about our wedding date. Do we move forward with a summer 2021 (originally summer 2020) wedding or do we postpone another year? I have strong feelings about trying to hold a destination wedding in the middle of a pandemic. I don't want to put our friends and family at risk since we won't know when vaccines will be widely available. But Erik is worried that his dad won't make it to 2022 since his dad already isn't in the greatest health. We agree on a new game plan: we hold off on our wedding celebration until 2022. In the meantime, we'll travel to his dad as soon as it's safe and get married with him in attendance. I email the wedding planners our decision to postpone (again) and go to bed.
5️⃣Section 5: This Week's Total & A Brief Reflection

Food & Drink	$1,000.57
Fun & Entertainment	$0.00
Home & Health	$125.85
Clothes & Beauty	$223.42
Transport	$0.00
Other	$119.35
GRAND TOTAL	$1,469.19

This was a pretty normal spending week (during the pandemic) for us, minus all the coffee trips due to our broken espresso machine. I know we spend a lot on food and we're okay with our level of spend, for now. It gets us out of the house, gives us a reason to take Fields out for a walk and explore the neighborhood, and allows us to support our favorite spots. My goals for this year are to increase the amount we put into investments and learn more about tax-efficient strategies.
Apologies for any and all typos!
EDIT: typos and a few words